Adoption

  • Most Topular Stories

  • Marriage after relinquishing a child--a good man helps

    [Birth Mother] First Mother Forum
    20 Sep 2014 | 10:11 am
    Celebrating our 25th anniversary Today is our 33rd wedding anniversary and after we did a quick stop at a church yard sale this morning and had coffee downtown outdoors--I thought about how my unknown daughter--unknown when we married--was a part of our lives from the very first time Tony and I met. Some of you know the story because I've told it before but today it's much on my mind.We met at a Sunday brunch in February, introduced by a mutual friend, Gael McCarthy. We had both been on The Daily Collegian at Wayne State University in Detroit, and we both ended up in New York City. My…
  • What are the Costs of Adoption? Is Adoption Trauma?

    Musings of the Lame- Exposing Adoption Truth
    Laurie Garland
    22 Sep 2014 | 10:29 am
    Separating mother and child causes varying degrees of lifelong trauma for both. If you are pregnant and considering adoption for your baby, please listen to the mothers of adoption loss and more importantly, the adoptees. Educate yourself of the effect adoption will have on both of you before it's too late. Anyone (including agencies) that will gain if your baby is adopted will NOT inform you read more... → Come on by to Musings of the Lame to read the rest of this post. Come on, you know you want to!
  • Letting go…and letting it be

    An Adoptee Centric Blog
    Gershom
    21 Sep 2014 | 2:33 pm
    As some of you may have read in past posts of mine my grandfather ( the father of my natural mother ) passed away this past July. I had mixed emotions when processing his death as he was a core stone in the decision to place me for adoption. Most of the stories I have […]
  • American Families Caught Attempting Illegal DRC Exit

    Parents for Ethical Adoption Reform (PEAR)
    PEAR-2013
    17 Sep 2014 | 8:56 am
    According to reports from the Democratic Republic of Congo ("DRC"), officials intercepted an attempt by three American adoptive families to remove their children from Congo without proper authorization (http://radiookapi.net/actualite/2014/09/14/trafic-denfants-la-dgm-demantele-un-reseau-dirige-par-un-citoyen-americain/).  This news story has been reported as "child selling" or trafficking by DRC news outlets (http://youtu.be/Ym4kecKFvIM).  PEAR understands that the three families in question had legally adopted the seven affected children according to DRC regulations,…
  • Gingerbread Men

    Lavender Luz
    Lori Lavender Luz
    22 Sep 2014 | 5:00 am
    Liam was Reed’s first friend. They met when Reed was just 6 months old (Liam’s mom is in my Vino Support Group). They went to the same school for a few years and must have had ten thousand sword duels and gunfights over the years. Liam and Reed on the first day of school 2007 […] The post Gingerbread Men appeared first on Lavender Luz.
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    Musings of the Lame- Exposing Adoption Truth

  • What are the Costs of Adoption? Is Adoption Trauma?

    Laurie Garland
    22 Sep 2014 | 10:29 am
    Separating mother and child causes varying degrees of lifelong trauma for both. If you are pregnant and considering adoption for your baby, please listen to the mothers of adoption loss and more importantly, the adoptees. Educate yourself of the effect adoption will have on both of you before it's too late. Anyone (including agencies) that will gain if your baby is adopted will NOT inform you read more... → Come on by to Musings of the Lame to read the rest of this post. Come on, you know you want to!
  • This is YOUR Appeal and I Thank You

    Claudia Corrigan DArcy
    19 Sep 2014 | 7:18 pm
    And I am thrilled to say that Carri's amazing legal team did indeed file the Notice of Appeal in Ohio's tenth district Court of Appeals this morning. The door to justice was about to lock shut and all of us, we threw our bodies into the that door and shoved out feet in that crack and now, that door shall remain open. read more... → Come on by to Musings of the Lame to read the rest of this post. Come on, you know you want to!
  • What Does Adoption By Gentle Care Have to Say About Caroline ( “Carri”) Stearns?

    Claudia Corrigan DArcy
    9 Sep 2014 | 6:00 am
    What Adoption by Gentle Care has to say, both publicly and privately, about Caroline ( "Carri") Stearns. Notice how they refuse to say that Camden is still sitting in foster care with all their various lies and untruths. read more... → Come on by to Musings of the Lame to read the rest of this post. Come on, you know you want to!
  • Adoption by Gentle Care; An Adoption Agency in Ohio Not so Gentle, Not so Caring

    Claudia Corrigan DArcy
    4 Sep 2014 | 8:03 pm
    I don't need to tell you what to do. I don't need to tell you to be outraged. I don't need to tell you how to feel about this mother and baby boy. I just ask that you help me do something. He is only 3 weeks old. He doesn't have to remembered this like Veronica Brown. read more... → Come on by to Musings of the Lame to read the rest of this post. Come on, you know you want to!
  • Updating on the Current UnEthical Adoption in Ohio

    Claudia Corrigan DArcy
    3 Sep 2014 | 9:55 am
    This CAN be over any minute. If the HAP's returned Camden to Adoption by Gentle Care and aren't willing to take the bullet; if the DNA results prove that they will fighting both an illegal consent of the mother and a refusal to consent from a father, then it just might be too much for these unethical characters. read more... → Come on by to Musings of the Lame to read the rest of this post. Come on, you know you want to!
 
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    An Adoptee Centric Blog

  • Letting go…and letting it be

    Gershom
    21 Sep 2014 | 2:33 pm
    As some of you may have read in past posts of mine my grandfather ( the father of my natural mother ) passed away this past July. I had mixed emotions when processing his death as he was a core stone in the decision to place me for adoption. Most of the stories I have […]
  • So much to say

    Gershom
    17 Sep 2014 | 9:41 am
    I find myself reading and reading and having so much I want to blog on and yet I get so emotionally involved in these posts I end up “drafting” them in order to not sound like a raging lunatic troubled by the frustrations and downright corruption in adoption and the foster care system….. I just […]
  • Denial of loss

    Gershom
    8 Sep 2014 | 8:47 pm
    10 years ago I wouldn’t have understood this to the depth that I understand it now, and for that I am grateful. Ten years ago this would have hurt me tremendously and I probably would have withdrawn into a wall building adoptee hiding comfort zone and disappeared from my mother for a few months until […]
  • Today I was with my mother…

    Gershom
    7 Sep 2014 | 4:26 pm
    Her husband was outside in the parking lot waiting for us as we pulled in. I recognized him immediately and waved and honked so he knew we’d arrived. We were about 15 minutes late due to a marathon in our area that slowed traffic. He came over and greeted us and helped us out of […]
  • I see my mother tomorrow

    Gershom
    6 Sep 2014 | 5:06 pm
    I get to see my mother tomorrow.
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    Parents for Ethical Adoption Reform (PEAR)

  • American Families Caught Attempting Illegal DRC Exit

    PEAR-2013
    17 Sep 2014 | 8:56 am
    According to reports from the Democratic Republic of Congo ("DRC"), officials intercepted an attempt by three American adoptive families to remove their children from Congo without proper authorization (http://radiookapi.net/actualite/2014/09/14/trafic-denfants-la-dgm-demantele-un-reseau-dirige-par-un-citoyen-americain/).  This news story has been reported as "child selling" or trafficking by DRC news outlets (http://youtu.be/Ym4kecKFvIM).  PEAR understands that the three families in question had legally adopted the seven affected children according to DRC regulations,…
  • DOS Alert: Democratic Republic of the Congo (DRC) Announces End to Exit Permit Exceptions Until New Law is Promulgated

    PEAR-2013
    11 Jul 2014 | 2:13 pm
    On July 10, Ambassador James Swan met with Director General Beya of the Congolese General Direction of Migration (DGM) to seek clarification on the DGM’s decision to no longer issue exit permits to any adopted Congolese children until a new adoption law is promulgated. DGM Beya stated that his office will not accept any cases for consideration in the interim, even those involving children with medical conditions or those cases that met the DGM’s October 2013 exception criteria.During the meeting, the DGM stressed that it considers no intercountry adoptions from the DRC to be…
  • DOS Alert: Haiti announces re-registration period for Adoption Service Providers

    PEAR-2013
    10 Jul 2014 | 8:27 am
    The Institut du Bien-Etre Social et de Recherche (IBESR), Haiti’s central adoption authority, recently announced updated information related to its Hague Adoption Convention intercountry adoption procedures. The announcement is available, in French, on IBESR’s website. Among other clarifications, IBESR announced that the registration period for re-authorization of international adoption service providers will be from July 14, 2014 until August 14, 2014. The list of supporting documents required is available on IBESR’s website in French. For more information on…
  • Riverkids Project - The beautiful lies that broke my heart

    PEAR-2013
    24 Jun 2014 | 2:27 pm
    I read Somaly Mam’s book cover to cover in a bookstore, holding myself utterly still so I wouldn’t start crying, drowning in the images of violence and suffering she wrote about.It was that cover picture, a Cambodian woman who had been through hell and survived. That gave me hope when I was the desperately confused new mother to children from Cambodia who had been bought and sold by traffickers, hurt in ways that I could barely comprehend, and deep in grief over all they had lost before coming to these new strangers in Singapore.We watched and read Alice Walker’s The Colour Purple, and…
  • DOS Alert: Benin Announces Temporary Suspension of Intercountry Adoption Applications

    PEAR-2013
    19 Jun 2014 | 8:18 am
    Benin informed the State Department that, as of May 22, it has temporarily suspended acceptance of new applications for intercountry adoptions as the Benin government prepares to implement the Hague Convention on the Protection of Children and Cooperation in Respect of Intercountry Adoption (Convention). The suspension applies to both plenary and simple adoptions of Beninese children.  The U.S. Embassy is in communication with the Benin government concerning transition cases; the government will decide how to proceed on a case-by-case basis.On February 26, 2014, the National Assembly…
 
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    Lavender Luz

  • Gingerbread Men

    Lori Lavender Luz
    22 Sep 2014 | 5:00 am
    Liam was Reed’s first friend. They met when Reed was just 6 months old (Liam’s mom is in my Vino Support Group). They went to the same school for a few years and must have had ten thousand sword duels and gunfights over the years. Liam and Reed on the first day of school 2007 […] The post Gingerbread Men appeared first on Lavender Luz.
  • #MicroblogMondays: Dog is My Co-Teacher

    Lori Lavender Luz
    15 Sep 2014 | 5:45 am
    I got up early to work on lesson plans. Dexter had other ideas. ~~~~ What is “#Microblog Mondays“? A post that is between 1 word to 8 sentences long. Head over to Stirrup Queens to join the fun.   The post #MicroblogMondays: Dog is My Co-Teacher appeared first on Lavender Luz.
  • Author Q&A: Melissa Ford on The Art of the Sequel

    Lori Lavender Luz
    11 Sep 2014 | 1:30 pm
    We’ve wrapped up the book tour for Melissa Ford’s third novel in the Life From Scratch series, Apart at the Seams.  And we’re fortunate today to have the author herself answering questions our very curious book group put to her. On Writing Book Tourist: How did you accumulate so many foreign-words-with-no-real-English-equivalent? Melissa Ford: It started […] The post Author Q&A: Melissa Ford on The Art of the Sequel appeared first on Lavender Luz.
  • The Apart at the Seams Book Tour is Here!

    Lori Lavender Luz
    4 Sep 2014 | 5:00 am
    Several book lovers are sharing our thoughts about Melissa Ford’s third novel, Apart at the Seams. Even if you aren’t part of the tour and even if you haven’t read the book, check out what people are saying — you might find that this book is one you want to put on your wishlist. NEWSFLASH: […] The post The Apart at the Seams Book Tour is Here! appeared first on Lavender Luz.
  • Birth Mother Stories: A Longitudinal Walk Through the Decades

    Lori Lavender Luz
    26 Aug 2014 | 7:00 am
    Previously, I introduced you to three women who had the experiences of placing a child for adoption in the 1960s, the 1980s, and the 2000s. They told us their adoption stories as birth mothers and shared their thoughts on what needed to change with the way adoptions were done. We continue the conversation here. Lee, […] The post Birth Mother Stories: A Longitudinal Walk Through the Decades appeared first on Lavender Luz.
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    O Momma Writes

  • Five Handy Portable Tools You Must Have

    Ashley Roberts
    17 Sep 2014 | 12:30 pm
    Maybe the scouts weren’t prepared for the bullying they were mercilessly delivered in high school, but that doesn’t mean there isn’t any merit to their age-old motto, be prepared. If anything, it applies now more than ever. As a citizen of earth it’s your moral duty to make sure you’re equipped with the tools required to make it through the day. But the good news is you don’t have to do it online. Read this handy guide, detailing five useful, completely portable tools you must have. Then head on over to Barbeques Galore and get yourself some Ziegler & Brown tools you’ll…
  • Young Families: Planning Tips for your Financial Future

    Ashley Roberts
    12 Sep 2014 | 11:31 am
    Starting a family is a massive commitment – in every area of your life, financial not the least. There’s a lot to consider, from how much nappies cost to whether or not you have the right transaction account. All those little decisions add up to a big difference when it comes to you financial future, and the future of your loved ones. To start, it’s often worth looking at the websites of financial institutions, such as www.boq.com.au, to ensure you’ve got the banking products that best suit your needs. With an understanding of the products available, some well thought out planning and…
  • Make Moving Less Stressful For You And Your Kids

    Ashley Roberts
    6 Sep 2014 | 4:12 pm
    Moving into a new house is a stressful time, especially if you’re moving far away. The experience becomes even more difficult when you have kids, particularly if they’re old enough to have settled into a school and made friends. You obviously want to make the transition as smooth as possible for both you and your children. You might have a tough time for a bit, but with a few clever strategies you can keep the tears and tantrums at bay. Prepare Them For The Move Before you start looking for that piece of prime real estate, your perfect home, it’s time to talk to the kids…
  • Keep Your House Under Control With These Storage Tips

    Ashley Roberts
    5 Sep 2014 | 4:12 pm
    When you have kids running around the house, practical storage solutions are a must. Without them, you end up with toys, clothes and anything else strewn all over the house. It would be impossible to keep your home in any semblance of organization without some sort of system.  But just because your storage is practical, it doesn’t mean it can’t look good too. Big plastic tubs might be fine for putting toys away in the playroom, but you don’t want them cluttering up your living room. Each room needs different solutions for storage, depending on what you need to put away.
  • How to Make the Best of a Budget Vacation

    Ashley Roberts
    4 Sep 2014 | 7:26 pm
    When it comes to budget vacations, the majority of people flinch at the very words. They think that the word ‘budget’ automatically implies that they’ll have to compromise on the quality of their vacation experience. The reality is that this couldn’t be farther away from the truth. Budget vacations mean that people have to be that little bit more creative when deciding on a destination. https://www.flickr.com/photos/68751915@N05/6736135095/ As a result, people end up exploring unfamiliar places, meeting new people, and ultimately having a vacation that they would never have dreamed…
 
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    Building Family Counseling

  • A workshop for adopted children this October

    Dawn Friedman
    18 Sep 2014 | 9:05 am
    I will be facilitating a workshop in partnership with the Central Ohio Families with Children from China. There are three tracks available and I encourage you to contact COFCC if you are interested in learning which one might be appropriate for your child. (Note: This workshop is open to children who have been adopted from other countries or domestically.) POWER OF “ME” is a workshop for children with the goal of empowering its participants with the skills necessary to enhance their development in a fun and friendly environment. Track A – W.I.S.E. Up! (9:30 – 11:30)…
  • Digging in the Dirt

    Dawn Friedman
    16 Sep 2014 | 8:38 am
    Peter Gabriel’s song, Digging in the Dirt, from his album Us is based on his experiences in therapy. This is a live version of his song and I’m sharing it because the original video of the song, (which I’ll link to here) can freak out people who don’t like creepy-crawlies. I do think the original video does a good job of showing how when we are in pain, we often lash out at the people around us. If you do watch the original, I’m curious — do you think the little boy he burns by pouring the coffee wrong is himself? Or is it the way he hurt his own children…
  • When you have nothing to say

    Dawn Friedman
    15 Sep 2014 | 8:26 am
    I remember when I was in my early 30s and seeing a therapist to process my experience with infertility. At the beginning I had so much to say that I didn’t know how I would make it between sessions. Then after (I thought) I had said it all, I would worry before appointments that she’d be disappointed because I didn’t have an idea about what we should talk about. I used to plan our topics. All week I would store up events or musings and I’d have them neatly prepared. I would continue to do this even after I realized that during most of our appointments we’d end up…
  • When clients and therapists don’t connect

    Dawn Friedman
    10 Sep 2014 | 5:42 am
    Another therapist commented on this post about finding a new therapist and I thought it’d be great to bring it over to a new post and continue the discussion. Anna said: I agree that being a good fit is important. I try my best to be a good therapist and I believe I am open to clients sharing anything with me. I believe in creating a non-judgmental environment. I even like when clients say they are mad at me or didn’t like something I said. It tells me we have that open relationship to talk about those things and sometimes those discussions lead to a greater understand of the…
  • At this moment, in this place

    Dawn Friedman
    8 Sep 2014 | 6:51 am
    Early in grad school one of my professors said that our job as counselors means being the healthiest person we can be at that moment in that place with our clients. He said, “You may be the healthiest person they interact with that week.” I began thinking about this in other contexts. Like I began saying to myself, “Right now in this moment, in this place be the healthiest person you can be in this conversation with tech support.” Or “Right now at this moment, in this place the healthiest person you can be while you try to get your child to see reason about…
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    Voices for Vietnam Adoption Integrity

  • Further Guidance from Holt and Dillon

    Christina
    20 Sep 2014 | 12:56 pm
    Dillon International reports that they have had “tremendous interest” in response to news about the new Vietnam adoption program.  They are hosting webinars to help answer people’s questions.  The next webinar will be Sunday, September 21st at 2pm Central Time (3pm Eastern, 12 noon Pacific).  They have also posted this short video to answer the […]
  • Details On New Vietnam Adoption Program

    Christina
    16 Sep 2014 | 11:41 am
    As we reported on Friday, the U.S. State Department announced that adoptions with Vietnam are re-opening, on a limited basis. Vietnam’s Central Adoption Authority, the Ministry of Justice, announced that it has authorized two U.S. adoption service providers to facilitate intercountry adoptions in Vietnam:              Dillon International, Inc. Holt International Children’s Services, Inc. Effective on […]
  • Joint Statement from Holt and Dillon on VN Adoptions

    Tracy
    12 Sep 2014 | 4:36 pm
    Holt and Dillon, the two agencies selected by the Ministry of Justice’s Department of Adoptions in Vietnam, have issued a joint statement after today’s announcement that they will be licensed for special needs adoptions. The full statement is available here.  
  • Adoptions Now Open

    Nicki
    12 Sep 2014 | 7:29 am
    Today, the Department of State announced the commencement of  a special adoption program:   Vietnam’s Central Adoption Authority, the Ministry of Justice, announced that it has authorized two U.S. adoption service providers to facilitate intercountry adoptions in Vietnam: Dillon International, Inc. Holt International Children’s Services, Inc. Effective on September 16, the United States will process […]
  • Why We Oppose CHIFF: A Misguided Bill With Misaligned Priorities

    Christina
    21 Aug 2014 | 8:30 pm
    In Brief: We believe that Senate bill 2475, “The Children in Families First Act of 2014” is flawed in its design.  Written without the consultation of either adult adoptees or first families, this bill pressures countries to open a pipeline of children for intercountry adoption and does so with funds redirected from current aid projects […]
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    Writing My Wrongs

  • Giving Up the Dreams

    Suz Bednarz
    22 Sep 2014 | 8:48 am
    In my previous post, I asked my readers to share their thoughts on “giving up” on a reunion. Thank you to the many that participated and provided commentary. As I suspected, it was rather interesting.  Opinions differed and yet I agreed with them all. How can this be? The answer is that “giving up” in relation to reunion, for me, is complex and has many facets.  Each of you likely responded to one or more of these facets. How do I interpret “giving up”?   Rather than telling you how I interpret it, I will share examples of living it. Giving Up the Dream – I gave up the…
  • Giving Up

    Suz Bednarz
    19 Sep 2014 | 12:19 pm
    Lara requested in her latest comment on the post Our Truths that I not “give up” on my daughter. I prepared a response to Lara comment before I post I want to ask my readers. What do you consider “giving up” in reunion? Or if you have told me “do not give up” what do you mean by that? It may seem obvious to you but I have learned there are different interpretations. Curious what yours is before I share mine. Do share. It could be interesting. Related posts: Six Years Later The FormSpring Outhouse Giving Up Wishes
  • Our Truths

    Suz Bednarz
    15 Sep 2014 | 6:57 pm
    I found my daughter online not quite ten years ago.   She confirmed for me I had the correct person and we exchanged a few emails.  I believe we also once chatted via AOL instant message.  Sometime during the exchange, she shared a fear. She feared I expected her to be something she was not.  She never told me exactly what that meant. I should have asked as I presumptuously assured her I did not. I told her I wanted to know who she is today and I had no expectations. This was an honest statement by one side of my personality – the adult, mature, educated side.  I had read my books,…
  • Polish Triggers

    Suz Bednarz
    12 Sep 2014 | 2:48 pm
    Social anxiety takes over as I approach the Queen Ann style home used by the Polish American Foundation of New Britain. While I am excited to improve my Polish language speaking skills, I am nervous about meeting the strangers.   I know once I get in the building and into the classroom the feelings will begin to dissipate. Parking is a bit confusing and I make two drive-bys before finding the parking lot behind their building. I am a few minutes early so I decide to check my email, Instagram and other items as well as attempt to calm my anxious stomach and racing heart. I would prefer to…
  • Legalized Lies – CO OBC

    Suz Bednarz
    11 Sep 2014 | 1:28 pm
    It is rumored at some point in the future the State of Illinois will allow mothers who surrendered their children to adoption to obtain a copy of the original birth certificate. I am anxiously waiting the day, as I will surely be one of the first to file.   When Illinois changed their laws to allow adoptees to get it, I did write her and ask if she would consider getting it and giving me a copy. I even offered to pay fees, etc. There was no reply. As such, I am thrilled the law will soon deem me worthy of having proof that my daughter exists and I gave birth to her. Yet even as I say that,…
 
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    Birthmother

  • The Language of Flowers

    Jayne
    27 Aug 2014 | 1:14 pm
    Why is it that when you see or hear your own feelings somewhere else, you finally feel validated? I was reading my local library's book club selection and am glad I wasn't able to make the discussion after finding the main character gave up her baby.These words really resonated with me.  Sure, they are part of the adoption "kook aid", but they are what I thought back then, too. I've changed words for my own situation. This segment took me back 23 years, like it was last week."But as much as I wanted to be reunited, I would not go to [him]. My desire for my [son] felt selfish. Leaving…
  • Chocolate

    Jayne
    25 Nov 2013 | 12:18 pm
    His adoptive mom will still not agree to meet or converse, and he apparently is still not interested in contact. However, most of his F*cebook posts seem to be public and I just learned he doesn't like chocolate. Neither do I. That makes me smile.
  • Facebook

    Jayne
    19 Feb 2013 | 1:05 pm
    I tried to message someone on a board and Facebook warned me that it might go in their "other" folder. "Other" folder? What's that? I looked at mine and found it. There was a message from Amom from almost two years ago when I accidentally sent a friend request to my (our?) son (and then un-sent it). I thought I had un-sent the request before he saw it. Apparently not. Her message to me was SCATHING. If I had seen it two years ago, I would have known then that all along she has just fed me a line of bullshit about ever getting together or having contact. I don't know what the hell she is…
  • Help me find ...

    Jayne
    15 Feb 2013 | 12:59 pm
    These Facebook posts where people are trying to find their birthmothers/birth parents make me sad in that my son knows how to get in touch with me and chooses not to do so. Yet, these kids/people do want to know their birth parents. Maybe I made myself too available, but I think I was also sold a "bill of goods" in that his adoptive mother made it sound like contact after the adoption would be possible.  You live, you learn I guess.
  • Moving on

    Jayne
    1 Oct 2012 | 1:07 pm
    It's been a few months since I sent his birthday card that was essentially my "see ya! you don't need me so I am gone". And I feel pretty good about it. I mean, I've gotten used to people who were important to me acting like I didn't matter. I didn't think my own son would treat me that way, but apparently he is. So really. See ya. I've gotta move on.
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    [Birth Mother] First Mother Forum

  • Marriage after relinquishing a child--a good man helps

    20 Sep 2014 | 10:11 am
    Celebrating our 25th anniversary Today is our 33rd wedding anniversary and after we did a quick stop at a church yard sale this morning and had coffee downtown outdoors--I thought about how my unknown daughter--unknown when we married--was a part of our lives from the very first time Tony and I met. Some of you know the story because I've told it before but today it's much on my mind.We met at a Sunday brunch in February, introduced by a mutual friend, Gael McCarthy. We had both been on The Daily Collegian at Wayne State University in Detroit, and we both ended up in New York City. My…
  • Open adoption--does it really solve all the problems?

    17 Sep 2014 | 12:48 pm
    LorraineWhen I gave my daughter up in 1966 all I really wanted—or thought I could ask for—was to be able to know her one day. That bare concession to the mother and child bond would not have made leaving her behind any easier, but it would have calmed my mind about the future. As I write today, open adoption is touted as the panacea for the pain of a closed adoption., or at least mute the anguish of mothers like me. Perhaps it would have been so—to know that she was safe and protected. But I don’t know how I would have reacted to other people being there for her, to be present but…
  • Pregnancy before Roe: I thought I was alone...but I wasn't

    14 Sep 2014 | 8:08 pm
    LorraineHow many of us got pregnant during the years when mores were changing in fact but not in public acceptance--the years after World War 2 and before abortion became legal? When I read about the various states--North Dakota, Texas, Missouri, to name a few--which are making abortion increasingly difficult and expensive, I am reminded of the time back when...I got pregnant. This is a excerpt from my memoir, hole in my heart:While I felt completely alone in my catastrophe, I actually had a lot of company. We women who got pregnant when we weren't supposed to in the Fifties, Sixties and…
  • Wrong name on birth certificate?

    11 Sep 2014 | 8:49 am
    JaneJust when we thought we heard it all, Jane read about a new twist in the make-believe world of birth certificates. A Portland, Oregon lawyer wrote recently about a case where:"Bio mother had child and her girl friend was at the hospital. The hospital checked the box as thought the girlfriend was a registered domestic partner and put girlfriend as parent on birth certificate. Parties were not registered domestic partners. Vital Stats says they will not correct the hospital error without a court order."'CERTIFICATE OF TITLE' Once upon a time, birth certificates contained the child's…
  • Political commercial leaves First Mother Forum speechless. Almost.

    8 Sep 2014 | 9:35 am
    Is there anything about this commercial that bothers you? Bothers me. Quite a bit.It's kinda like the jewelry commercial from Kaye that we wrote about a few months ago. Once again, a commercial celebrates the joy of adoption--which I know is very real for many people--but this ad is so unthinkingly heartless for those of us who have a different sense about what adoption means-- the actual mother who gives birth, to the child who is handed over to genetic strangers, the family who lost a child. This ad certainly will trigger negative feelings in adoptees and birth mothers, which is why it was…
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    The Declassified Adoptee

  • PA, Adoptee Rights, and an Amended Bill--What now?

    Amanda
    17 Sep 2014 | 5:07 pm
    Photo (c) Julie StrombergOn Tuesday, September 16, 2014, the Pennsylvania Senate Aging and Youth Committee held a voting hearing for HB 162.  As drafted, HB 162 would restore the right of PA-born adult adoptees, nineteen years or older, to access a copy of their original birth certificate (OBC) with the same regard under the law enjoyed by every other PA-born citizen.When a child is adopted in the U.S., a amended birth record replaces their OBC that lists their adoptive parents as their biological parents.  In 48 states, the OBC is sealed.  Every single state has a law on the…
  • Adoption and Fundraising: When Money to Breaks Down Systemic Barriers for Families

    Amanda
    28 Jul 2014 | 7:37 pm
    Aselefech runs for family preservation.There are a number of factors behind why I was placed for adoption.  Economics by far is one of the most pervasive.  My narrative is one among countless that attest to the way in which economics constricts the choices families and parents have--to keep their children, to not experience the removal of their children, to not become pregnant if they do not wish to be.I have been outspoken for the past five years against adoption fundraisers.  I have been asked countless times over the years to donate my written word or official endorsement to…
  • As Rightful Narrators: Adoption, RAD, and Storytelling

    Amanda
    23 May 2014 | 3:30 pm
    Recently, the New York Times Motherlode blog posted an essay by author Tina Traster entitled, "You're not my Real Mother."  The essay processed her gut reaction to hearing the infamous "you're not my real mom" phrase from her daughter.  Traster retorted "well who is then?" and directed her daughter never to say the phrase again.  Traster described her own hurt feelings while disclosing her daughter's adoption narrative and Reactive Attachment Disorder (RAD) diagnosis to readers across the globe.  Her daughter's narrative and diagnosis are also embedded in the premise of…
  • "I do not Have to Help Them": Pushing Back Against the Apathy of Those With Power

    Amanda
    23 Feb 2014 | 9:49 am
    "The Representative would like to meet with you," came a young woman's voice over the speaker of my cell phone. "It is urgent. You must come to Harrisburg as soon as possible." I agreed to attend, and quickly contacted two other adoption activists. It was the summer of 2010. I was relatively new to adoption activism and knew better than to go by myself. I knew why she had called.  This legislator had submitted a bill that competed with a pending original birth certificate access bill.  After his office ignored our attempts to engage with him personally, we launched a social media…
  • "Your Child Should not be Your First Black Friend": NPR, Transracial Adoption & the Powerful Voice of Chad Goller-Sojourner

    Amanda
    30 Jan 2014 | 7:13 am
    It has been two weeks since NPR's The Sunday Show aired a segment on transracial adoption that caused outrage within the adoption community.  To give a brief re-cap, Angela Tucker, an African American transracial adult adoptee who is the subject of the documentary "Closure," an adoption blogger, and a former adoption professional was interviewed for the segment only to be told that her interview would not be used.  Instead, NPR chose an interview with a white adoptive parent of three young transracially adopted children.As the initial point of contact between NPR and…
 
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    One Thankful Mom | Lisa Qualls

  • I Will Never Be Bored

    Lisa Qualls
    19 Sep 2014 | 7:04 am
    If you never want to be bored, have a large family. Something is always changing. Over the last few months many of our kids have made big changes. Noah got married (it still surprises me to see a ring on his finger), Hannah became a third year resident, Samuel decided to go to graduate school, and […]
  • Thank You, Friends

    Lisa Qualls
    17 Sep 2014 | 7:18 am
    When I published my post Monday, I felt some anxiety – I didn’t want to disappoint anyone. You poured your kindness on me through your comments and my heart was encouraged. I honestly have the best readers – thank you. One of the keys to successfully parenting children from “hard places” seems to be flexibility. If […]
  • The Year I Sent My Kids to School

    Lisa Qualls
    15 Sep 2014 | 10:01 am
    A week ago today, I stood at the bottom of the driveway and watched my children get on the yellow bus. I didn’t write about it right away because I needed time to sit with the decision. I have lots to share, but the end of this story is that I’m taking a sabbatical from […]
  • My Learning Curve: Handling Hard Feelings

    Lisa Qualls
    12 Sep 2014 | 10:36 am
      In my last two posts I’ve written about three points of encouragement we are focusing on with Dimples. The first two are: 1. Fun to be around 2. Cooperation and Respect The third is: 3. Handling hard feelings How we handle difficult emotions has a huge impact on our relationships. My older kids are quick […]
  • My Learning Curve: Cooperation and Respect

    Lisa Qualls
    11 Sep 2014 | 12:43 pm
    Monday I wrote that we are focusing on three points of encouragement with Dimples. 1. Fun to be around  I wrote about that earlier this week in this post. Our second point of encouragement is: 2. Cooperation and Respect When we see Dimples cooperating with us, or with her siblings, we try to make a […]
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    Rage Against the Minivan

  • What I Want You To Know About Being Pregnant And Depressed

    22 Sep 2014 | 6:00 am
    What I Want You to Know is a series of reader submissions. It is an attempt to allow people to tell their personal stories, in the hopes of bringing greater compassion to the unique issues each of us face. If you would like to submit a story to this series, click here. Today’s guest posts is by  Allison. I just had the 18 week sonogram two days ago and found out we're having a boy, and from the looks of it healthy and not missing any important bits.It's been two days and 18 weeks and I've yet to be happy about being pregnant.Sure, there was the initial "Hooray!
  • That's what SHE said: race and parenting, regretting motherhood, adoption and loss, being a gay Christian, and more . . .

    21 Sep 2014 | 10:59 am
    The Racial Parenting Divide: What Adrian Peterson Reveals About Black Vs. White Child-Rearing | Salon.ComWhite children in general are raised to be Columbus, to “discover” the world anew and then to manipulate and order the universe to their own liking. If we take away the colonizing impulse in living this way, I think it would be amazing to have the luxury of raising black children who also view the world as a space of their own making, a space to be explored, a space to build anew. A space where occasionally, simply because you live there, you can opt to walk in the middle of the street…
  • Friday Finds

    19 Sep 2014 | 12:00 pm
    1. Boys canvas high-tops | The Gap 2. Bitsies 10-Pack | 31 Bits3. Striped dress | Gilt 4. Typography Birdhouse | Anthropologie 5. Healthy granola bars | Intoxicatedonlife6. 3 Natural linen eco friendly storage baskets | Etsy 7. Leather buckle clutch | The Gap 8. Canyon Road Tunic Dress | Anthropologie 9. Home Sweet Home dowel wall art | Urban Outfitters  1. Zipitbedding.com2. Boost Solar Backpack | Birksun3. Pipsticks — Subscriptions for Sticker Lovers4. Cognac Triple Zipper Satchel |…
  • 31 Bits launches a children's line!

    19 Sep 2014 | 7:14 am
    I've been a longtime fan and supporter of 31 Bits. In addition to being cute and fashion-forward, 31 Bits jewelry is made out of 100% recycled paper, posters, and magazines by displaced women in Northern Uganda. Each piece of jewelry is unique and hand-crafted by a woman in the community of Gulu, Uganda. I've gotten to know the founders of 31 Bits over the years (the headquarter in my town) and I'm such a fan of their work.This week, they are launching a children's line! Geared toward 6-10 year old kids, Bitsies are available in 10 different colors, each with an inspiring…
  • What I Want You To Know When Having A Family Does Not Come Easy

    19 Sep 2014 | 6:00 am
    What I Want You to Know is a series of reader submissions. It is an attempt to allow people to tell their personal stories, in the hopes of bringing greater compassion to the unique issues each of us face. If you would like to submit a story to this series, click here. Today’s guest posts is by  Rev. Jacqueline Hope DerbyAs I write, my husband and I are beginning our third round of collecting everything needed to update our Home Study for our adoption. Doing the Home Study three years ago was a daunting task—especially as it signaled the end of our quest to overcome…
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    Julie Gumm - Author

  • My beauty product splurge – 3D Fiber Lashes

    Julie Gumm
    15 Sep 2014 | 6:57 am
    I don’t review a lot of products on this blog, and I certainly don’t review beauty products regularly, but today that’s what you’re getting. So if you’re one of my male readers feel free to move on to the next blog post of the day now A few weeks before we moved my friend Jen was over for a late night editing session and she asked me if I had ever heard of 3D Mascara. She proceeded to fill me in on this weird sounding stuff where you put green tea fibers on your eyelashes. Say what? Anyways, fast forward a couple months and someone invited me to an online party…
  • The Whole World Wants a Job

    Julie Gumm
    2 Sep 2014 | 6:13 am
    Gallup has just published early findings from their “World Poll.”  They are literally conducting a ten-year poll of what the entire world is thinking (160 countries). Here’s a snippet from their main discovery: “What the whole world wants is a good job. That is one of the single biggest discoveries Gallup has ever made. It is as simple and as straightforward an explanation of the data as we can give. If you and I were walking down the street in Khartoum, Tehran, Berlin, Lima, Los Angeles, Baghdad, Kolkata, or Istanbul, we would discover that on most days the single…
  • What’s new in the new version of “Adopt Without Debt”

    Julie Gumm
    8 Aug 2014 | 6:50 am
    Now that the new book is listed on Amazon I’ve had a few people ask me what the difference is between the two books. So here’s the low down… The first book was self-published in May 2011 and was approximately 25,000 words (152 pages) The first book is out of print and only available from used book sellers who are charging an exorbitant amount of money. Please don’t go into debt to buy the book The first book told our story and focused only on how to pay for adoption. The new book is being released by a “real” publisher – Abingdon Press. (January 6,…
  • Transitioning to Life in Small Town America

    Julie Gumm
    3 Jul 2014 | 11:33 am
    We’re here. I haven’t written much since I posted about our impending move 3 months ago because we’ve been busy working, purging, packing, purging some more and dealing with the typical end-of-year craziness. The boys both graduated 8th grade – Luke as valedictorian. The very next day Mark and I headed out to Ark. because I started working in the office the following Monday. It was definitely a much quicker, quieter ride just the two of us – a throwback to our college days. We had basically 24 hours before Mark headed out for Haiti but had time to stop by the…
  • Happy 15th!

    Julie Gumm
    10 Jun 2014 | 6:21 am
    This kid is 15 today! (Which makes me feel old.) I cannot even begin to tell you how proud I am to have the privilege to be his mom. He is generous, thoughtful, hardworking, self-motivated, smart, funny and just an all around amazing young man. Four more years of watching his sports games will make me completely gray but I LOVE it! Happy Birthday Luke!
 
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    Lost Daughters

  • Claiming White American Identity as an Asian Adoptee: When Race and Ethnicity Diverge in Transracial-Transnational Adoption

    Mila
    19 Sep 2014 | 3:00 am
    I recently read an article, An Ethnicity Conversation Your Adoptive Child Wants You to Have, by a Korean American adoptee, Elizabeth Connolly. The article got me thinking about the incredibly complex racial and ethnic identities that transracial-transnational adoptees must learn to manage--often while having to field a barrage of scrutiny and criticism both within and outside of the adoption community.In her article, the author addresses the tension she has experienced within her identity as a Korean adoptee who has grown up in a White family. She writes, “I am very proud to be Asian and a…
  • Better Late Than Never: A Guest Post from Noelle Sickels

    Liberty
    16 Sep 2014 | 5:33 am
    I am a “late discovery” adoptee, a term I learned only recently. I’m also a historical novelist. These  self-definitions came together in a surprising way while I was researching my latest novel, Out of Love.As a historical novelist, doing research is not only a job requirement, it’s also my favorite part of the work. My three previous novels were set, respectively, in 1852, 1886, and 1943. I read old diaries and old newspaper articles, and I immersed myself in the clothing styles, slang, and homemaking chores of those bygone years, all as a way to create characters whose…
  • Tracing Your Roots

    Elle
    11 Sep 2014 | 9:00 pm
    As an interracial adult adoptee who is among the fortunate ones that was able to find my birth family and also being a lost daughter and female adoptee--- for me it meant that once the missing pieces in my puzzle had been found. Only then could I turn my attenton elsewhere and focus on trying to help my mum and dad trace their own roots. I've done so already way back in the past, in High School I choose to research  my mum's paternal relatives as a final project work.I suppose my interest for genealogy had to with my quest for my own identity not knowing who I was at the time (I still…
  • "Blended" is Clueless

    Cathy Heslin
    10 Sep 2014 | 2:30 pm
    This is NOT a picture from the Blended photo seriesNaturally, adoption in the media captures my attention, this post certainly drew me in...'Blended' Photo Series Captures The Unconditional Love Between An Adopted Child And His FamilyThe pictures are certainly beautiful. The baby is adorable. The adoptive family looks like a happy family. I can almost understand why they thought this was a good thing to document and put out into the world. But, there are just so many things that are so wrong here. First of all there's the title about Unconditional Love. Since it was a story about a baby…
  • A Haitian Adoption Story: Review of The Roving Tree by Elsie Augustave

    Karen Pickell
    2 Sep 2014 | 11:05 am
    Elsie Augustave’s novel The Roving Tree tells the story of a Haitian adoptee, Iris Odys, who at the age of five is given for adoption by her poor single mother to a white couple from New York state. She is raised there, along with her new older sister, also white and also adopted. Guiding her development are her black American godfather—a family friend—and her Haitian dance teacher. Iris’s involvement in college with the Black Students League ultimately leads her back to her native country, where she begins to uncover her biological identity and develops a yearning to understand her…
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    One Inch of Grace

  • Love in the D: Michael and Barbara’s Wedding

    shannon2818
    21 Sep 2014 | 7:42 pm
    I’ve been co-blogging at Love in the D for several months and I wanted to share my latest post, featuring Michael and Barbara’s Detroit wedding. I’ve known Barb since she was about 7, so it was fun to interview her and see all her beautiful photos. If you were married in Detroit and would like […]
  • Why My Kids Go to a Primarily Black School

    shannon2818
    12 Aug 2014 | 7:32 pm
    Originally posted on Ashleigh Carroll:Most people know that our kids go to Downtown Elementary, which is a public school here in Memphis that happens to have mostly black students enrolled. This is not an accident. My journey started when John suggested we submit an application for Jac to go to Perea Preschool, which is…
  • This week in Detroit

    shannon2818
    1 Aug 2014 | 5:00 pm
    The “beach” at Campus Martius The Detroit RiverfrontFiled under: Family in the City, Our Adopted Life
  • The interview of a lifetime

    shannon2818
    25 Jul 2014 | 7:18 pm
    Well, maybe this wasn’t really the interview of a lifetime, but I did get to interview someone that’s made a huge difference for my family: Heather Forbes. If you’ve read my blog before, you know that I am a big fan of Heather’s and her parenting model, Beyond, Consequences, Logic and Control (you can read more […]
  • Adoption Day 2014

    shannon2818
    25 Jun 2014 | 8:17 pm
    On June 25, 2010, our adoption became legal. The kids and I had dinner and dessert out today to celebrate. We spent a couple minutes sharing our memories from the past four years. I felt good that I finally had some memories to share with them that they didn’t remember. Since I didn’t know them […]
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    Unsigned Masterpiece

  • The truth shall also set you free…

    Unsigned Masterpiece
    27 Aug 2014 | 2:19 am
    A great post from Lost Daughters on the choppy waters of adoption reunion. If You Love Something, Let It Go Free And this feels like the companion piece to the Lost Daughters post.  From The Adopted Ones: Good Grief – This Gets So Tiring. I am adding another post to this list a day after […]
  • No Good Deed Goes Unpunished (Adoption Division)

    Unsigned Masterpiece
    20 Aug 2014 | 12:54 pm
    Then I noticed it. Down at the bottom of the email was a box and in it, in lovely, flowing, colourful letters, they expressed support for adoption.
  • Adoption Should be A Last Resort…

    Unsigned Masterpiece
    20 Jul 2014 | 1:29 pm
    It's always good when people "Get it"
  • The Power of Biology, the Fear of Fertility (and adoption)

    Unsigned Masterpiece
    10 Jul 2014 | 11:48 am
    Great piece in The Land of a Gazillion Adoptees.  This is a great online magazine coming up to its first anniversary.Filed under: Adoption
  • Judy Collins (and Adoption)

    Unsigned Masterpiece
    8 Jun 2014 | 2:35 pm
    A song that has always been one of my adoption songs. Born to the Breed.Filed under: Adoption Tagged: Born to the Breed, Judy Collins
 
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    Together for Adoption

  • Adoption is the Story: Do you we have your attention yet?

    Dan Cruver
    22 Sep 2014 | 10:43 am
    You do not need to know an orphan personally to change the life of an orphan for the better.We all know this.We live in a day when it’s never been easier to help someone who lives on the other side of the world—even if that someone is an orphan.Well, believe it or not, it’s even gotten easier.As you know, Together for Adoption’s national conference is coming to Greenville this October 17-18.But before I go on about this year’s conference…Don’t let the word ‘adoption‘ in the name Together for Adoption fool you. T4A isn’t mainly about…
  • More talks than ever before with unprecedented interaction for you

    Dan Cruver
    15 Sep 2014 | 6:00 am
    Not counting our emcee (Johnny Carr) and this year’s worship leader (Randall Goodgame), you will hear from 18 different people in our main sessions this year. Six of them will speak for 30 minutes while 12 of them will speak for 10 world-shaping minutes (if you are familiar with TED Talks, you are already familiar with the format we will use)Each of the six 30-minute talks with be followed by a panel of key leaders within the adoption movement who will join her/him on stage to discuss the presentation and what its implementation would mean in our care for at-risk children. In addition…
  • To Our Facebook Friends & Twitter Followers

    Dan Cruver
    12 Sep 2014 | 1:49 pm
    To all our Facebook friends and Twitter followers: Whether or not you are attending our October 17-18 Together for Adoption conference here in Greenville, South Carolina, would you consider helping us spread the word via Twitter and/or Facebook status updates (or, if you have one, even on your blog)? Can’t tell you how much it would mean to us if you did.We’ve even provided ready-made tweets to make it easy for you: http://www.togetherforadoption.org/2014/tweets/Thank you so very much in advance!
  • How to Cut Through the Noise

    Dan Cruver
    11 Sep 2014 | 5:11 am
    To help you dive deeper into the critical issues surrounding caring for at-risk children, we are excited to offer workshops at this year’s Together for Adoption National Conference that cut through the noise.FRIDAY, OCTOBER 17THWorkshops A: 10:30 – 11:30AMSession: A Deeper Look at the Gospel of Adoption as Family Reunification Speaker: Dan Cruver Description: How many of us within the evangelical orphan care and adoption movement talk like this? “In the Bible, adoption is never about taking orphans and making them sons and daughters of God. It’s always about God taking…
  • 2014 Conference Buttons

    Dan Cruver
    10 Sep 2014 | 12:25 pm
    Will you help us spread the word about this year’s Together for Adoption conference by using one of our buttons?260×125: <a href=”http://www.togetherforadoption.org/2014/”><img alt=”t4a-greenville-260-125″ src=”http://www.togetherforadoption.org/wp-content/media/t4a-greenville-260-125.jpg” width=”260″ height=”125″ /></a>210×165: <a href=”http://www.togetherforadoption.org/2014/”><img alt=”2014 Button”…
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    AMERICAN INDIAN ADOPTEES

  • Op-Ed: Buffy Sainte-Marie on Canadian Museum of Human Rights, Genocide

    22 Sep 2014 | 7:15 am
    http://canadiangenocide.nativeweb.org/cover.html OP-ED: Buffy Sainte-Marie · @BuffySteMarie 21st Sep 2014 from TwitLonger The Canadian Museum of Human Rights opens next week but I went in for a preview look yesterday. My expectations were low but my hopes were high. The museum is not nearly complete and that's disappointing, so it's totally premature for any real comment but at least what I did see was better than I'd feared. By the way, they do use the word genocide several times in exhibits about the treatment of indigenous Canadians. And there is a piece on missing and…
  • Disproportionate number of aboriginal children in care in Canada

    17 Sep 2014 | 2:55 am
    Joanne Bernard says issue needs to be addressed in collaboration with federal government CBC News  Joanne Bernard says, according to departmental numbers, about 22.5 per cent of children in care are aboriginal, but only 2.7 per cent of the population in Nova Scotia is of aboriginal ancestry. (CBC) Nova Scotia's minister of community services says she's concerned about the disproportionate number of aboriginal children in community care. For the first time in eight years, Department of Community Services ministers met to discuss social issues, the most worrisome perhaps being the high…
  • Indigenous Resistance: Tribunal on Indian Boarding Schools

    15 Sep 2014 | 2:55 am
    Indigenous Resistance: Tribunal on Indian Boarding Schools Oneida, WI, October 2014...:October 22 -- 25, 2014: Wisconsin event to focus on U.S. Indian boarding schools, promote healingMount Pleasant Indian Industrial Boarding School More than 200 undocumented deaths of children including Anishinaabe. Blue Skies Foundation has scheduled a Tribunal to focus on the experiences of Native children who were forced at early ages to attend Indian boarding schools. This Tribunal is scheduled for October 22 through the 25, 2014 at the Radisson Hotel and Conference Center, at Oneida,…
  • ‘We found you in a catalogue of Native children’ #60s Scoop

    14 Sep 2014 | 6:50 am
    CLICK ‘We found you in a catalogue of Native children’I also want to share this link to a recent post on my Lara blog about adoption>>>herevisit: www.tracedemeyer.com
  • Real ID Act? They didn't think of adoptees with fake birth certificates?

    11 Sep 2014 | 2:55 am
    Americans will soon be barred from boarding airplanes unless they surrender to federal 'Real ID' cardby: J. D. HeyesTags: REAL ID cards, airline travel, states'' rights (NaturalNews) Residents of nine states who attempt to use their driver's license to enter some government agency offices will be denied, because their legislatures have not agreed to accept a federal law called REAL ID. In fact, according to The Boston Globe, if those states do not accept the law, residents will also eventually lose their ability to use driver's licenses to board commercial flights.The paper reported that the…
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    Infant Adoption Guide

  • IAG 026 – Adoption Grants with Becky Fawcett of HelpUsAdopt.org

    Tim Elder
    19 Sep 2014 | 1:59 pm
    Most of us who are working to save money for our domestic infant adoption could use help with covering the cost. What if you could get FREE money for your adoption journey? Our guest on the show today is Becky Fawcett, an adoptive mom, blogger, and the Founder/Executive Director of HelpUsAdopt.org, which is a national non-profit […]
  • Adoption, vacation and pillow pets in the rear view mirror

    Tim Elder
    6 Sep 2014 | 9:31 pm
    Over the years, my wife and I have been on several vacations together. Many of them were road trips where it took several hours to get to our destination. Maybe you know what it’s like to pack for a long road trip. As much as we try to simplify our packing and take only the […]
  • IAG 025: Adoption Home Study Questions & Answers with Lori Fraas

    Tim Elder
    29 Aug 2014 | 6:13 am
    How would it feel to ask a social worker about your adoption home study BEFORE you started the process? What if that social worker had already completed over 1500 home studies? Licensed clinical social worker Lori Fraas is our guest on the show today. She shares her experience from completing over 1500 home studies. She […]
  • Adoption book review: How To Create a Successful Adoption Portfolio by Madeleine Melcher

    Tim Elder
    23 Aug 2014 | 9:34 pm
    How important is your adoption profile?  It is the biggest tool you have to help you get a quick match with an expectant mother. It is something we pin our hopes on to make the connection we need to build our family through adoption. Your adoption profile (also known as your adoption portfolio) can also be […]
  • IAG 024: How to simplify and shorten your path to adoption with Amanda Grant from USAdopt

    Tim Elder
    13 Aug 2014 | 1:48 pm
    Want to save time, money and stress on your adoption journey? Absolutely! We all would like that, right? Amanda Grant is our guest on the show today and she will tell us how to simplify and shorten the path to adoption. She is an adoptive mom and Founder/CEO of USAdopt.com. Most people (for very valid […]
 
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    All In The Family Of Adoption

  • Paradigm Shift: Carrie and Camden: Surmountable separation

    Kellie C
    16 Sep 2014 | 8:08 pm
    I was going to write something for Carri, but I could not say it any better than Margie.  Please go and read and consider giving just a few dollars to help Carri fight to get her son back. Paradigm Shift: Carrie and Camden: Surmountable separation: Carrie Stearns is a struggling mother, like many of us are for one reason or another. Raising five children, the birth of her son Camde...
  • Would You Be Pro-Adoption?

    Kellie C
    7 Sep 2014 | 5:30 pm
    Not too long ago Robin, our resident adoptee writer, asked me the following question: "If Olivia's adoption hadn't closed, do you think you would be pro-adoption?”I answered with the following, and she suggested I share it in a blog post: "I’ve asked myself this very question many times, and I don’t believe I would have been pro-adoption even if Charlie wouldn’t have objected in the end.  If she would have said the night before or the day she signed the papers, “Mom, I’m fine.  This is the right decision.” I still think there would be issues with us…
  • Welcome To My World: Long Hard Road Out of Hell

    Kellie C
    31 Aug 2014 | 1:50 pm
    Welcome To My World: Long Hard Road Out of Hell: Well, it only took eight years, numerous frivolous motions and a lot of tantrums, but the end came swiftly and brutally for the foster paren...
  • You Can't Change How Other People Feel

    Kellie C
    17 Aug 2014 | 5:34 pm
    I've never heard my granddaughter's voiceI've never heard her laugh.I've never watched her run or play or dance.I've never brushed her hair.I've never read her a book.I've never sang her a song.I've never held her hand.I've never watched a Disney Princess movie with her.Instead, strangers have more of those privileges than her biological family.  Those of her biological family who are allowed a relationship, that is.Certain words and phrases were used to convince her mother, and us, our granddaughter would still be a part of our family and the minute her mother let it be known she was…
  • One Day

    Kellie C
    10 Aug 2014 | 2:00 pm
    Cats are said to have nine lives.  It is a superstition founded in a cats ability to survive accidents which might have killed other animals.  Using this line of thinking (and modern medicine), one may conclude humans have more than just nine lives.  Knock on wood (and yes, I just knocked on wood) I haven't had any close calls physically, but I’ve had a couple of losses in my life.  If you doubt you can have an experience that equates to a "living death" you haven't truly experienced a loss.   My mother’s death used up my first “life”.  The loss of…
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