Adoption

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  • Liberty and Justice for adoptees--WHEN?

    [Birth Mother] First Mother Forum
    3 Jul 2015 | 3:54 pm
    "The Constitution promises liberty to all within its reach, a liberty that includes specific rights that allow persons, within a lawful realm, to define and express their identity" began the Supreme Courts' opinion in the gay marriage case, Obergefell v. Hodges. Absolutely agree. And it's about time the courts make good on that promise to adoptees who still can't obtain basic facts about themselves in a majority of states.Obergefell was based on two premises, that marriage is a basic right and gays Janeshould not be treated differently than non-gays. It's only a short leap to conclude that…
  • Fathers: Never too late to find your child

    [Birth Mother] First Mother Forum
    21 Jun 2015 | 5:11 am
    JaneWe set aside a day every year for children to honor their fathers. Although the day is co-oped by the likes of Hallmark, Sports Authority, Cabela's, it's still an important rite, enjoyed by families nationwide.For children adopted as infants who do not know their natural fathers, it can be a day of sadness. Their fathers not only abandoned their mothers, justifiably many fathers would argue, but deserted their children as well. In fairness to these fathers, the patriarchal culture played a part. Sex is good for men, taboo for women, and if a girl got in trouble, well, it was her fault.
  • UNJUST Sealed Birth Certificate Laws

    [Birth Mother] First Mother Forum
    30 Jun 2015 | 5:25 am
    My original birth certificate--everyone should have the sameAs the legislative session wound down in New York, the Assembly passed a bill that allows natural birth parents not only a veto, but put in place a confidential intermediary system, those assuring that many more birth mothers will deny their children knowledge of their original identity. The bill (S5964) was referred to the Senate Rules committee but in the flurry of activity that engulfs the legislative chambers in the last hours of every session, it stayed in committee as the session ended.After years of work on giving adoptees the…
  • Bubble Soccer. BAM!

    Musings of the Lame- Exposing Adoption Truth
    6 Jul 2015 | 8:14 am
    By Lori Holden Last week my kids participated in Bubble Soccer camp. What is bubble soccer, you may ask? Let my son — they boy in the red shoes — show you. ~~~ This post is part of #MicroblogMondays? Whazzat? A post that’s not too long. Head to Stirrup Queens to join the fun. The post Bubble Soccer. BAM! appeared first on Lavender Luz. Read at the Source: : Come on by to Musings of the Lame to read the rest of this post. Come on, you know you want to!
  • Keren Riley's Interview of David Smolin About the Evangelical Christian Adoption Movement

    Fleas Biting
    Desiree
    6 Jul 2015 | 3:25 pm
    On May 1, 2015 David Smolin (law professor with expertise in child laundering issues in international adoption; independent expert for the Hague Convention; and blogger here on Fleasbiting) participated in a session at the annual Christian Alliance for Orphans (CAFO) Summit. That session was a dialogue between Jedd Medicind, President of CAFO, spotlighted as an apologist for the evangelical Christian Adoption movement, and David, introduced as a critic of the evangelical Christian Adoption movement.In the interview linked to below, Keren Riley of Reunite Uganda asks David a series of…
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    Musings of the Lame- Exposing Adoption Truth

  • Bubble Soccer. BAM!

    6 Jul 2015 | 8:14 am
    By Lori Holden Last week my kids participated in Bubble Soccer camp. What is bubble soccer, you may ask? Let my son — they boy in the red shoes — show you. ~~~ This post is part of #MicroblogMondays? Whazzat? A post that’s not too long. Head to Stirrup Queens to join the fun. The post Bubble Soccer. BAM! appeared first on Lavender Luz. Read at the Source: : Come on by to Musings of the Lame to read the rest of this post. Come on, you know you want to!
  • Denying Adoption vs Dwelling on It: When to Tell

    2 Jul 2015 | 8:14 pm
    By Lori Holden Question: We already have an open adoption. My son is 4 years old and I keep wondering: when is a good time to tell him that he was adopted? I still think its too early right now, but when do other parents start to open up about this? I just don’t want to make it … Continue reading Denying Adoption vs Dwelling on It: When to Tell → The post Denying Adoption vs Dwelling on It: When to Tell appeared first on Lavender Luz. Read at the Source: : Come on by to Musings of the Lame to read the rest of this post. Come on, you know you want to!
  • Bait and Switch Foils NYS Adoptee Rights

    30 Jun 2015 | 8:14 pm
    By Mirah Riben “In this day and age, there is no reason why there should be restrictions on an adoptee having access to their original birth certificate.” David Weprin, New York State Assemblymember representing Queens 24th Assembly District. A New York bill allowing adults who were adopted as children to obtain access to their original birth certificates, was “destroyed” by members of the NY State Assembly before it passed by a 125-19 vote on June 18, according to... Come on by to Musings of the Lame to read the rest of this post. Come on, you know you want to!
  • Update on the Guatemala Kidnapping and American Adoption of Karen Abigail Monahan

    30 Jun 2015 | 8:14 pm
    By Mirah Riben In December 2014 I reported on the Guatemala kidnapping of Anyeli Liseth Hernández and her US adoption by Timothy and Jennifer Monahan of Liberty Missouri who named the child Karen Abigail. Susana Luarca, aka Susana María de la Asunción Luarca Saracho who was charged with criminal association, human trafficking, and the use of forged documents in 2013, was recently sentenced to 18 years in a Guatemalan prison for arranging the illegal adoption of Anyeli. In addition, the judges... Come on by to Musings of the Lame to read the rest of this post. Come on, you know you want to!
  • Chasing Myself

    30 Jun 2015 | 8:14 pm
    By AstridBeeMom Sometimes it feels as if adoption swallows EVERY. SINGLE. PART. OF. MY. LIFE. While I love what I do, the people I help, the people I educate, the people who help me, the people who educate me, sometimes I find myself shutting down in the adoption world as it all becomes extremely overwhelming at times. Since this is a personal journey, for me, like so many others, it is often hard to separate all the pain that I feel with what I’m trying to do. I still find that I am at a... Come on by to Musings of the Lame to read the rest of this post. Come on, you know you want to!
 
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    Fleas Biting

  • Keren Riley's Interview of David Smolin About the Evangelical Christian Adoption Movement

    Desiree
    6 Jul 2015 | 3:25 pm
    On May 1, 2015 David Smolin (law professor with expertise in child laundering issues in international adoption; independent expert for the Hague Convention; and blogger here on Fleasbiting) participated in a session at the annual Christian Alliance for Orphans (CAFO) Summit. That session was a dialogue between Jedd Medicind, President of CAFO, spotlighted as an apologist for the evangelical Christian Adoption movement, and David, introduced as a critic of the evangelical Christian Adoption movement.In the interview linked to below, Keren Riley of Reunite Uganda asks David a series of…
  • The Corrupting Influence of the United States on a Vulnerable Intercountry Adoption System: A Guide for Stakeholders, Hague and Non-Hague Nations, NGOs, and Concerned Parties

    David Smolin
    17 Nov 2013 | 6:27 pm
    The above-titled draft article by one of our bloggers, David Smolin, is posted and available for free download on his bepress site linked below.  The article analyzes the corrupting influence of the United States on the development and present workings of the intercountry adoption system.  A context for this corrupting influence is provided through a careful analysis of the theoretical and practical vulnerabilities of the intercountry adoption system.  The distinctive approaches of the United States to social work, adoption, human rights, children's rights, constitutional law…
  • The Liberal Roots of the Modern Adoption Movement

    Desiree
    6 Sep 2013 | 9:12 pm
    Two of our Fleasbiting bloggers--David and Desiree Smolin--were asked to write one of the three "cover stories" for the second issue of a new online magazine, "Gazillion Voices."  (We'll soon be posting more about Gazillion Voices--an effort we enthusiastically support--in another blog post)Our finished liberalism and adoption piece is titled, "The Liberal Roots of the Modern Adoption Movement."Here are the first few paragraphs.  (To read the rest of the essay, please click on the link at the end.  It will take you to Gazillion Voices.) Please leave any comments you might…
  • The "Baby Veronica" Case and the Abuse of Adoption

    David Smolin
    16 Aug 2013 | 8:14 pm
    Amidst the conflicting claims regarding the actions and character of the parties contending for custody of almost-four year old Veronica, it is the undisputed facts that seem most significant.  Dusten Brown is Veronica’s father.  Dusten Brown has fought for Veronica from the time, when she was four months old, that he became aware that Veronica’s mother wanted to place her for adoption.  (There is much dispute about what happened during the pregnancy and in those first four months, but no substantive dispute about what happened since then.)   The adoptive parents…
  • Journal of Christian Legal Thought Issue on Adoption: Hopes for a Mature Dialogue

    David Smolin
    6 Jun 2012 | 7:57 pm
    The Journal of Christian Legal Thought, a publication of the national Christian Legal Society and Regent University School of Law, allowed me to help put together an issue on adoption.  Thanks to Mike Schutt, the editor, for his courage in publishing what may be seen as a controversial issue, and for his trust in giving me flexibility in recruiting a diverse group of authors.  The adoption issue of the Journal of Christian Legal Thought is available online in e-mag format; click on the following link:   Journal of Christian Legal Thought, Vol. 2, No. 1, Spring 2012.
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    ReadingWritingLiving

  • In Which Trying to Write an Essay About Shame Threw Me Into a Huge Shame Spiral, And How I Got Out of It

    Susan
    11 Jun 2015 | 12:54 am
    Image by Volkan Olmez/Unsplash I thought that writing an essay for a themed literary magazine on the theme of “shame” was going to be a piece of cake. I was excited when I read this call for submissions; I thought I would write something easily, in the space of an afternoon. I had a whole truckload of images, anecdotes and memories ready to stitch together on the topic. I’d start with one of my adoptive mother’s favorite phrases: “Shame, shame,” the way she said it in a lilting, almost singsongy voice, accompanied by the hand gesture of two index fingers…
  • My Heart’s Edge

    Susan
    14 Apr 2015 | 12:00 pm
    20 years ago, I began putting together pieces for a collection of literature about adoption. Poet Tina Cervin was my coeditor and we spent years passing shopping bags full of manuscripts back-and-forth to each other. Yes, no, maybe? Finally, in 1999, the book was born. We were so proud of it, of the beautiful works by first time writers as well as rock stars like Isabel Allende, Charles Baxter, Dan Chaon, and even Joni Mitchell. (her poem/song “Little Green” is about the daughter she relinquished for adoption) It was a gorgeous, powerful book, but was never a huge commercial…
  • Good Thing I’m Not An Architect

    Susan
    23 Mar 2015 | 9:02 pm
    If I was an architect or a builder, I’m sure that I’d be building falling-down bridges and houses whose floors tilted so that marbles would roll from wall to wall. My staircases would be crooked and there would be corridors that led nowhere. Surely, the bathtubs would leak onto the kitchen table. It’s taken me decades to construct this book of mine, this story-without-end. I’ve read countless books and taken classes, hired helpers and still, this unwieldy piece of writing has eluded me like Jell-O slipping through my fingers. I spent today in a fever, writing a book…
  • Clearing The Way for Words

    Susan
    23 Feb 2015 | 6:34 pm
    I’ve been dealing with some writing “stuckness” in the past month or so. And I’ve been aware that it’s had to do with both inner and outer obstacles. The writing was just not happening. The first thing I needed to deal with was my space. I alternate between writing in my home office, and my shared office space at the San Francisco Writers’ Grotto. But recently I realized I was fleeing to the Grotto more often than not, because my own space was just such a damn mess. These photos don’t even begin to show the half of the mountains of paper and boxes all…
  • Walking, Writing, Shhhhhhh

    Susan
    17 Feb 2015 | 9:26 pm
    Walk without speaking for one hour. Then, write without stopping for another hour. It’s a simple sequence, but somehow it’s magical, what that combination can produce. I’ve been doing this practice since 1996, when my writing friend introduced me to it. We’d switch locations: one week, we’d walk the beach in San Francisco and then write at her house; then the next week, we’d walk in the redwood forest and write at mine. We ended up writing hundreds of pages in this way. What happened in that silence during the walk?  Every walking hour was different.
 
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    Parents for Ethical Adoption Reform (PEAR)

  • PEAR Advisory Alert for DRC

    PEAR-2013
    17 Jun 2015 | 12:28 pm
    On June 2, 2015, the Department of State issued a new alert which supersedes the alert of October 6, 2014. This newest alert strongly recommends against adopting from the Democratic Republic of the Congo (DRC at this time. This warning is separate from any potential ending of the current suspension on the issuance of exit letters. The Department of State noted that pending legislative changes could invalidate or suspend any future adoption decrees.  http://travel.state.gov/content/adoptionsabroad/en/country-information/alerts-and-notices/DRC15-06-02.htmlOn December 29,…
  • DOS Alert: Faith International Adoption Accreditation Suspended

    PEAR-2013
    7 Jan 2015 | 8:29 am
    On January 6, 2015, the Council on Accreditation (COA) suspended the accreditation of Faith International Adoptions for a minimum of 15 days and until appropriate corrective action has taken place. COA is the Department of State’s designated accrediting entity for adoption service providers under the Hague Adoption Convention (Convention), the Intercountry Adoption Act of 2000 and the Intercountry Universal Accreditation Act (UAA).  The suspension is due to COA’s finding that Faith International Adoptions failed to maintain substantial compliance with the accreditation…
  • DOS Notice : China : Changes to Requirements

    PEAR-2013
    5 Jan 2015 | 10:09 am
    The China Center for Children’s Welfare and Adoption (CCCWA) recently announced changes to their intercountry adoption procedures.  The changes that apply to prospective adoptive parents (PAPs) in China fall into three broad categories:  1) the eligibility requirements for PAPs, 2) post-placement requirements, and 3) China’s fees for intercountry adoption. These changes are effective January 1, 2015. Changes to the PAP eligibility requirements:a.    The CCCWA will now allow couples in which the individuals are over 50 years of age to adopt a child. The age…
  • DOS Alert: The Department of State Strongly Recommends Against Adopting from the DRC at this time

    PEAR-2013
    6 Oct 2014 | 11:13 am
    In light of the DRC’s September 26, 2014 announcement that its exit permit suspension for adopted children remains in effect indefinitely, the Department of State has asked all adoption agencies to cease referring new DRC adoption cases for U.S. prospective adoptive parents at this time. The Department of State strongly recommends against initiating an adoption in the DRC at this time, as adoptive children cannot leave the DRC without an exit permit issued by the DRC’s Directorate of General Migration, even with a finalized adoption.  Congolese courts continue to issue adoption…
  • USDOS Office of Children’s Issues Announces New Chief of the Adoption Division

    PEAR-2013
    25 Sep 2014 | 11:40 am
    Welcome Trish Maskew, New Chief of the Adoption DivisionSeptember 24, 2014The Office of Children’s Issues is pleased to announce the appointment of Trish Maskew as the new Chief of the Adoption Division. Trish joins the Department of State from the Department of Justice where she worked in the Civil Division for almost six years.  Before joining the U.S. government, she held several positions in the intercountry adoption field: as a program coordinator for an adoption agency; a board member and interim administrator for the Joint Council on International Children’s Services; the…
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    Lavender Luz

  • Bubble Soccer. BAM!

    Lori Holden
    6 Jul 2015 | 4:00 am
    Last week my kids participated in Bubble Soccer camp. What is bubble soccer, you may ask? Let my son — they boy in the red shoes — show you. ~~~ This post is part of #MicroblogMondays? Whazzat? A post that’s not too long. Head to Stirrup Queens to join the fun. The post Bubble Soccer. BAM! appeared first on Lavender Luz.
  • Denying Adoption vs Dwelling on It: When to Tell

    Lori Holden
    2 Jul 2015 | 9:01 am
    Question: We already have an open adoption. My son is 4 years old and I keep wondering: when is a good time to tell him that he was adopted? I still think its too early right now, but when do other parents start to open up about this? I just don’t want to make it … Continue reading Denying Adoption vs Dwelling on It: When to Tell → The post Denying Adoption vs Dwelling on It: When to Tell appeared first on Lavender Luz.
  • Totes Adorbs

    Lori Holden
    29 Jun 2015 | 6:35 am
    Take a little bit of poodle and add in some bichon. Mix together and you end up with my sweet, sweet, funny, sweet, thoroughly adorable Dexter. (Alert: when you hit play you’ll hear music.) Six Months of Dexter in 15 Seconds More gratuitous Dexter pics are just a click away. ~~~ This post is part … Continue reading Totes Adorbs → The post Totes Adorbs appeared first on Lavender Luz.
  • How to Explain to Children Differing Levels of Openness in Adoption

    Lori Holden
    25 Jun 2015 | 7:20 am
    Dear Lavvie:    How do we explain different levels of openness to our children? We have a very close relationship with our son’s birth mother and his biological brother and grandparents but because of our daughter’s birth mother’s lifestyle our relationship with her and her other children is limited. Our children are only 2 and … Continue reading How to Explain to Children Differing Levels of Openness in Adoption → The post How to Explain to Children Differing Levels of Openness in Adoption appeared first on Lavender Luz.
  • One of My Shortest Posts Ever

    Lori Holden
    22 Jun 2015 | 4:27 am
    I’m curating an online magazine called Open Adoption Matters, free to read on any of your devices. I hope you’ll subscribe. View my Flipboard Magazine. Also, my book is now out in paperback. $10 less than before. (My actual shortest post is here.) ~~~ This post is part of #MicroblogMondays? Whazzat? A post that’s not … Continue reading One of My Shortest Posts Ever → The post One of My Shortest Posts Ever appeared first on Lavender Luz.
 
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    O Momma Writes

  • Understanding your Child’s Growth Milestones

    Ashley Roberts
    11 Jun 2015 | 2:13 pm
    Children grow up incredibly quickly and before we know it, they’re already teens and adults. Even though having a baby is often a very stressful and time-consuming experience, it’s not long before your baby is a toddler on the move and then a child who’s off to school every single day. Understanding the developmental benchmarks for your baby and toddler will help you to know that your child is developing well and is growing in the manner that they should. For example, babies will normally start holding their heads up on their own around four months old, but they may not be…
  • What’s the right pillow for you? And how to choose!

    Ashley Roberts
    24 Apr 2015 | 7:31 am
    Pillows! They are so important for a good night’s sleep, but they are not all one and the same and there is no ‘one size fits all’. Perusing the multitude of available pillow options can be confusing and it can also be hard to know where to start or what you actually need. Why buy quality? While many different bedding products, including pillows, are available at a range of price points, buying the best quality possible is always advisable. Refer to the websites of exceptional quality pillow and bedding companies to better understand the features and benefits of the products they sell.
  • 10 Smart Ways Moms Can Spend Their Tax Returns

    Ashley Roberts
    22 Apr 2015 | 12:50 pm
    While tax season is usually dreaded, the silver lining for many people is the tax return check they will receive. While the amount ranges from small to large depending upon the person, any extra money is a welcomed blessing. Though it can be tempting to blow through that money, before making a rash decision as to where to spend it, take a careful look at your budget. Assess your financial means before determining whether the money should be saved or spent.   Here are 10 smart ways moms can spend their tax returns:   Home Improvements Many home improvement projects go on the back…
  • How to Sell Your Phone for Cash

    Ashley Roberts
    7 Apr 2015 | 12:47 pm
    With many people looking to upgrade their mobile phones, there are tons of old cell phones available that can be exchanged for money. If you are also one of those people asking “where do I sell my mobile in the UK for a good amount of cash?”, then there are several methods to do that. With the immense popularity of the Internet, it has become a main source of business in twenty first century. You can also take the assistance of the Internet in order to sell your mobile phone and earn money by placing an auction of your phone on several websites. There you can choose your preferred method…
  • Tips for Planning Your Child’s Birthday Party

    Ashley Roberts
    1 Apr 2015 | 2:48 am
    Having a great birthday party for your child can mean the world to them. With lots of fun activities and great fun, your child will have a birthday they are sure to remember for years to come. One problem that a lot of parents have is that they do not necessarily know how to plan out their child’s upcoming birthday party and so they leave it for the last minute until things fizzle out. This can result in a boring, dull and unmemorable party that your child may not enjoy at all. The key factor to planning out your child’s birthday party is to keep things fun, light and on a budget.
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    Adopt This!

  • Wait, Wait! Back It Up

    issycat
    18 Jun 2015 | 2:41 pm
    I do realize I have been gone for like forever.  So here are ten things: 1. I am a straight up, early 70’s BSE adoptee.  That stuff was closed up.  I knew nothing about nothing for most of my life.  It was infuriating!  I was told around age 2 and I remember being befuddled.  What the what?  I have other parents?!  What the heck happened?  Nobody knew.  Nobody cared to know.  Heck, I didn’t even know what time I was born until I was FIFTEEN.  Yes.  When I was fifteen, I called the adoption agency when my parents weren’t home and begged them for information. …
  • Anodyne

    issycat
    15 Jun 2015 | 8:47 am
    I have been away for a long time.  I wish I could say that I have missed this blog, but mostly I haven’t. Four years.  It’s been four years that this place has been private.  And in those four years, I did not write a single word here.  I just went in on occasion and archived the four years of writing that had lived here.  I have used it as source material for a memoir that will most likely never see the light of day. I stopped writing because this blog had become a place of contention and reaction and hurt feelings and misunderstanding.  I stopped writing because I…
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    welcome to my brain . net

  • Reframing Michael and Christine

    16 Jun 2015 | 4:36 pm
    Sharing life on the Internet is risky business. … Choosing how vulnerable you want to be is tricky. People assume that they know everything there is to know if they simply read a blog or follow a Twitter feed.  As if sharing one deeply personal thing means all writers share all the things going on in their lives.” - Tara LivesayA note from Michael and Christine: That internet thing is great, as a window. A window with curtains that can be open and shut as we please. We share some things about our kids, but not all things.  They are not all ours to share and they are not for all…
  • Recapping a decade of my life

    16 Jan 2015 | 7:42 am
    (photo by Alyza Moore for the "Bodies Born to Rise" project)I have spent the last several months going through every last inch of this blog. Reorganizing. Cleaning up old labels. Making it easier to find things. I'm not done and still have many hours of work ahead of me.In March it will be ten years of blogging.It's a weird thing to be able to look at a decade of your life. Not all of it. Just the parts I let others see, of course. But that is its own interesting experience. It's not news that I have been writing less and less. I have stared at it to find exactly what/when/how this has…
  • Jar-o-Good

    5 Jan 2015 | 2:35 pm
    Last night in the car one of the kids was talking about an idea they heard in their student group for the new year. Make a jar that you can place in a prominent-enough location that you won't forget about it. Write down the good things that happen to you. Take a moment in the evenings to do it. On your bad days, you can randomly read about and be reminded of the good in your life.Simple.I love that idea. It is similar to daily gratitudes, but with a twist. My brain immediately went to parents who are working with struggling kids. I coach caregivers to journal in some way, any way, the…
  • Therapeutic Parenting Resources

    8 Oct 2014 | 6:52 am
    (christineparentcoaching.com)I have been working very hard the last few weeks to reorganize the things I have learned over the past six years, when it comes to parenting. My goal has always been to share. However I can.As you would suspect, as my life has been pretty messy, my sharing has been pretty messy. Scattered. So, I have been putting a very deliberate effort into organizing and re-presenting it in a way that can be more easily searched and utilized.On my coaching site, you will start to see all of my little nuggets show up under the "Blog" tab. If you've read me for some time, you…
  • Open up that October door!

    1 Oct 2014 | 7:16 am
    (photo by Kate Northern; used with permission)October.It's the most wonderful time of the year in my house.Halloween ... and National Coming Out Day!I remember a time in the 80's when there was a big hub-bub in our little town over Halloween. A group of people became very vocal about the dark side of the holiday and were pushing parents to stop participating in the costumes and the trick-or-treating. Of course, my friends were the ones showing up at school with the "Save Halloween!" shirts. I did not wear one. I had already gotten my pastor-father in enough trouble a few years before wearing…
 
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    A Birth Project

  • New article on “Lost Daughters” : Rachel Dolezal and the Privilege of Racial Manipulation

    Lisa Marie
    14 Jun 2015 | 11:31 am
    This madness around #RachelDolezal has me and many other transracial adoptees and transracial families squirming and a bit angry. Please check out this article I wrote for Lost Daughters about the whole debaucle. Transracial Lives Matter: Rachel Dolezal and the Privilege of Racial Manipulation “The commodification of Otherness has been so successful because it is offered as a new delight, more intense, more satisfying than normal ways of doing and feeling. Within commodity culture, ethnicity becomes spice, seasoning that can liven up the dull dish that is mainstream white culture.” bell…
  • I’m performing at Stanford June 5th – Free! Come through!

    Lisa Marie
    14 May 2015 | 9:48 am
    Thrilled I’m joining all of these amazing artists Friday evening June 5th to perform an excerpt of “Ungrateful Daughter” for the “Soul Wounds: Trauma and Healing Across Generations” conference at Stanford University. I will be there for the whole conference, I hope you will come, and say hello at the reception after the performance. Filed under: Performance Tagged: adoptee, adopting a black child, adoption events, black adoptee, lisa marie rollins, Transracial Adoption
  • Feb 19th New Show in progress Performance! Come!

    Lisa Marie
    6 Feb 2015 | 10:44 am
    Come check out a 30 minute excerpt of my newest solo show in progress on Feb 19th at The Bside Barn in Oakland, CA. This new show continues some of the themes begun in “Ungrateful Daughter” around adoption, loss, longing, grief and finding your worth as a woman. I’ll be performing along side two other amazing solo performers for a full night of theater.   Description of the show: Side Chick: This ain’t no Harlequin Romance – written & performed by Lisa Marie Rollins Lisa Marie didn’t plan on being a mistress, but somehow here she is, in a hotel in Tahoe…
  • Family Consultations

    Lisa Marie
    28 Jan 2015 | 3:40 pm
    I’ve been getting the usual onslaught of emails from folks who are in need of support or who are starting to come to grips with the commitment they have made adopting a child of color. Are you a potential or parenting adoptive parent and need some support developing strategies for creating your community to reflect your family? Have you been thinking about moving your family to a more diverse city? a different school? Are you concerned with your TRA’s life being an isolated one? I want to remind folks that I offer individual family skype or in person consultations. 1-3 sessions,…
  • Feb 19th new show and TheRoot.com article

    Lisa Marie
    28 Jan 2015 | 2:05 pm
    For those of you who’ve been waiting for a new solo show from me – yeeee! I’m SO excited to share a brand new piece on February 19th at The BARN in West Oakland. It is an exerpt from my newest solo show in progress, “Side Chick: This ain’t no Harlequin Romance”. This new theatrical piece explore ideas around black womanhood, dating, adoption (of course), race and finding your worth. I can’t wait to share it. Buy your tickets now!  also – check it out – I’m on the front page of TheRoot.com today! yeee! oh adoption. Filed under:…
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    Voices for Vietnam Adoption Integrity

  • Vietnam Authorizes Third Agency to process adoptions

    Administrator
    29 Jun 2015 | 7:37 pm
    The U.S. State Department published an alert on June 24th stating that : Vietnam’s Central Adoption Authority, the Ministry of Justice, announced that it has authorized U.S. accredited adoption service provider Alliance for Children to facilitate the adoption of Vietnamese children under the Special Adoption Program. It was not made clear why this agency was […]
  • Holt’s Blog asks families to consider Vietnam adoption

    Administrator
    10 Feb 2015 | 9:42 am
    A Holt International Children’s Services Blog post today highlight’s their Vietnam program.  The post gives a bit more information than previously on their site, and it also features a specific waiting child, “Demetria” a little girl who is not yet 2 years old. To read more about the program, or see the little girl featured […]
  • Holt, Dillon and U.S. State Department work together

    Administrator
    29 Jan 2015 | 6:03 pm
    In a joint press release received from Holt International and Dillon International by VVAI today; Leaders from the two agencies met this week with Terrence West, Deputy Consular Chief of the U.S. Embassy in Hanoi, Vietnam, to discuss how the agencies and Department of State can cooperate to help the most vulnerable children. Representative’s from […]
  • VN Ministry of Justice Clarifies Criteria

    Christina
    9 Jan 2015 | 6:16 pm
    The Department of State yesterday posted a notice regarding recent clarifications on the part of the Vietnamese Ministry of Justice.  According to MOJ/DA, healthy children who live outside of orphanages currently do not qualify for the Special Adoption Program, even if they are aged five or older or are in biological sibling groups. The MOJ/DA […]
  • Further Guidance from Holt and Dillon

    Christina
    20 Sep 2014 | 12:56 pm
    Clarification (9/24):  As was stated in our earlier post, Dillon will accept applicants up to 55 years of age.  Also, Dillon lists the time from application to placement as “To Be Determined”. Holt International has confirmed that the fees listed at the link below are up to date.  The adoption fee for Vietnam, which is […]
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    Writing My Wrongs

  • Congrats to Aimee!

    Suz
    6 Jul 2015 | 7:45 am
    Congratulations to Aimee in TX! She is the winner of our random drawing for a free copy of Lorraine Dusky new book Hole In My Heart. Thank you all for partipcating and sharing! Aimee your book will be on its way to you. Others can purchase the book on Amazon and Barnes and Noble. Related posts: Get a Free Copy of Hole In My Heart Back Hole in My Heart Hole In My Heart
  • Get a Free Copy of Hole In My Heart

    Suz
    29 Jun 2015 | 12:15 pm
    I am officially sponsoring a book give away! I will give one lucky winner a brand new copy of Lorraine Dusky new book Hole in My Heart. Here is what you need to do to qualify: Read my pseudo review on the book. You can find it here. I say pseudo because I have more to say on the book but that is forthcoming. Previous post contains my initial reaction. Share that post on your Twitter feed, Facebook or blog post. Easiest way to do this is use the Share Twitter or Facebook buttons at the bottom of the post. You can also copy this bit.ly link http://bit.ly/1NqvuXm and paste it into your own post…
  • 10 Years Since I Found Her

    Suz
    28 Jun 2015 | 12:56 pm
    Today is the 10 year anniversary of finding my daughter.  In reflecting I recall an arch of excitement, hope, fear, anxiety followed by disappointment, anger, sadness. These days the primary emotion is a dull weight of  sadness. No longer do I suffer the extreme emotions. There is just a dull presence, always dragging me a bit slower than I want to be, distracting my thoughts at times I am trying to think of other things.  I still suffer nightmares, a teeny bit of depression and can still be easily triggered.  Mostly, its just this dull sadness.  A paperweight on my soul. That being…
  • Lorraine Opens a Hole

    Suz
    22 Jun 2015 | 1:25 pm
    I am woefully behind on a personal review of Lorraine Dusky new book Hole In My Heart: memoir and report from the fault lines of adoption. I would love to say this delay was due to an overabundance of work, winning the lottery and running off to Turks and Cacos or even lounging at the side of my in ground pool catching rays for days.  It is none of the aforementioned.  It is something entirely different (see below). I can offer that I thought the book was incredibly well written, painfully moving and superbly architected. By this I mean that Dusky was brilliant in her decision to root her…
  • Caring for Siblings

    Suz
    15 Jun 2015 | 4:09 pm
    For all of my adult years my mother has tried to force relationships between me and my siblings (and likely vice versa). She has insisted I always invite both my sisters to any invite, that all siblings should be included in all events, that I should call this sibling or that sibling when they are ill or struggling. I have resisted this greatly. I am particularly close with only one of my siblings. Candidly she is the only one I look forward to seeing, the only one I think has any amount of understanding and respect for me and mine, and the only one I truly want part of my life. My other two…
 
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    [Birth Mother] First Mother Forum

  • Lobbying for OBCs in New York

    7 Jul 2015 | 8:39 am
    LorraineWhat is it like to lobby for a bill that gives adoptees the right to know who they are? We in New York have worked long and hard for a clean bill only to be rebuffed year after year. We need more bodies, more people willing to be strong and stand up for their own rights, and while mothers must be part of the effort, it is adoptees in numbers and unafraid to ask for what should be theirs by fiat are the ones who will bring this victory home.As noted previously, a very bad bill supposedly for adoptees did pass the New York Assembly in the last hours of the session this year and was sent…
  • Liberty and Justice for adoptees--WHEN?

    3 Jul 2015 | 3:54 pm
    "The Constitution promises liberty to all within its reach, a liberty that includes specific rights that allow persons, within a lawful realm, to define and express their identity" began the Supreme Courts' opinion in the gay marriage case, Obergefell v. Hodges. Absolutely agree. And it's about time the courts make good on that promise to adoptees who still can't obtain basic facts about themselves in a majority of states.Obergefell was based on two premises, that marriage is a basic right and gays Janeshould not be treated differently than non-gays. It's only a short leap to conclude that…
  • UNJUST Sealed Birth Certificate Laws

    30 Jun 2015 | 5:25 am
    My original birth certificate--everyone should have the sameAs the legislative session wound down in New York, the Assembly passed a bill that allows natural birth parents not only a veto, but put in place a confidential intermediary system, those assuring that many more birth mothers will deny their children knowledge of their original identity. The bill (S5964) was referred to the Senate Rules committee but in the flurry of activity that engulfs the legislative chambers in the last hours of every session, it stayed in committee as the session ended.After years of work on giving adoptees the…
  • Fathers: Never too late to find your child

    21 Jun 2015 | 5:11 am
    JaneWe set aside a day every year for children to honor their fathers. Although the day is co-oped by the likes of Hallmark, Sports Authority, Cabela's, it's still an important rite, enjoyed by families nationwide.For children adopted as infants who do not know their natural fathers, it can be a day of sadness. Their fathers not only abandoned their mothers, justifiably many fathers would argue, but deserted their children as well. In fairness to these fathers, the patriarchal culture played a part. Sex is good for men, taboo for women, and if a girl got in trouble, well, it was her fault.
  • A first mother's point of no return

    15 Jun 2015 | 9:51 am
    Jane in 1968 Natural mothers have a date burned in their brains--the day events put them on the trajectory culminating in the loss of their child. It is the day they saw him leaning against the wall at a high school dance, the day they went to that party they really didn't feel like going to--and were raped, the day they had unprotected sex because he pleaded or they thought it was safe or they didn't know any better. Our destinies as childless mothers seem fated.For me, the day was in 1965, when I decided to return to Alaska from graduate school in the South, intending to…
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    The Declassified Adoptee

  • An Open Letter: Why Co-opting “Transracial” in the Case of Rachel Dolezal is Problematic

    Amanda
    17 Jun 2015 | 8:32 am
    Amanda's Note: I was proud to participate in the drafting and endorsement of this much-needed letter as an ally to the transracial adoptee community. Please share this letter widely and follow/support #definetransracial on Twitter.Rachel Dolezal. Photo credit: artist unknown.June 16, 2015Please direct all media inquiries to Kimberly McKee, PhD at mckee.kimberly@gmail.com.This past weekend the world took to social media to dissect the events surrounding Rachel Dolezal, the former president of Spokane’s NAACP chapter who came under heavy scrutiny for falsely representing herself as…
  • Born. Adopted. Sealed. Deported: the Fight for Equality for Adopted People

    Amanda
    21 May 2015 | 5:55 am
    "Born. Adopted. Sealed. Denied!" was the hallmark chant of the Adoptee Rights Demonstration during my years attending and co-planning the demonstration as the now-former Vice President of the Adoptee Rights Coalition. The demonstration and its simple four-word message aimed to educate  legislators attending the annual National Conference of State Legislatures regarding a near 90-year-old legal practice that seals the original birth certificates of adopted people in all but 2 states and treats adopted people unfairly when attempting to access this certificate in all but 6 states. When we…
  • Fifty Shades of Gross: a Feminist Confrontation of the Story's Adoption and Foster Care Themes

    Amanda
    16 Feb 2015 | 11:24 am
    I read the Fifty Shades of Grey books at the suggestion of my sister-in-law who has dual degrees in communications and English and is a popular books maven of sorts. She has the uncanny ability to predict whenever any bit of media will become relevant in pop culture. If you want to look like a pop culture genius at your book club, you ask her for a title to recommend to the group. If you want to know what basically unknown lit is going to explode into everyday conversations tomorrow, she can tell you that too. Her suggestion regarding Fifty Shades fell into the latter category."I'll apologize…
  • Happy Reunionversary: 9 Things I've Learned in 5 Years of Reunion

    Amanda
    4 Jan 2015 | 9:31 pm
    My necklace of our matching pair.I had already known my original mother's name for several months before we reunited. As is the practice in my birth state, most adoptees can have their original birth certificates and know their mother's name using the established government channel. We are forbidden to reach out on our own as the civil and criminal legal consequences of doing so are thoroughly explained and signed off on before our records are unsealed. My mother, my first mother, had given me permission to see my original birth certificate. I received a copy of her handwritten…
  • VIDEO National Adoption Month? The Lost Daughters #flipthescript

    Amanda
    7 Nov 2014 | 9:33 am
    Headed by @mothermade, Lost Daughters is flipping the script with this awesome round table style video by Bryan Tucker. Click here for the full length version and remember to share with the tags #NationalAdoptionMonth and #flipthescript.Being grateful for my adoptive family & questioning the ethics of modern adoption practices are not mutually exclusive. #FliptheScript #NAM— Mila (@yoonsblur) November 3, 2014
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    One Thankful Mom | Lisa Qualls

  • Where are They This Summer? [Annarose]

    Lisa Qualls
    7 Jul 2015 | 10:45 am
    In the midst of sadness, life keeps moving forward. I’m almost thankful that although I may want to escape my life, my kids make it impossible. Today I’m continuing my update on the kids’ summer adventures. Annarose lives life more fully than anyone I know. She has such a passion for friends, family, the Lord, adventure – […]
  • Gathering

    Lisa Qualls
    6 Jul 2015 | 10:53 am
    It’s been a quiet week for me – I’ve had a hard time doing normal life, getting out of bed, and even being around people. It may have been more than three decades ago, but vivid details of Nick’s birth and the following days fill my mind when I least expect them.  I remember the […]
  • God is Faithful, Even in Loss

    Lisa Qualls
    30 Jun 2015 | 9:25 am
    On June 15th I published the post, Not Inoculated; I reflected on the realization that although we had suffered a terrible tragedy, we were not protected from future sorrow. One week later, on June 22nd, my son, Nick, died. If you’ve read my Tell it Well series, you know that Nick was born when I was a […]
  • Loss Upon Loss – Our Brother, Nick

    Isaiah Qualls
    27 Jun 2015 | 11:22 am
    This is Isaiah. My mom will post something next week; she just can’t yet. I don’t really know how to write this. It seems impossible that we could be going through this again. I found out last night that my oldest brother Nick died earlier this week. My mom had Nick when she was a teenager. […]
  • Where are They This Summer? [Beza]

    Lisa Qualls
    25 Jun 2015 | 11:55 am
    Beza’s summer is off to a great start. First, she finished her school year earning academic honors, and best of all, she enjoyed her teachers and classes. Second, she got a job! Beza is a hard worker, but it’s not always easy to get a job at fifteen. She was hired by a cleaning company […]
 
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    Rage Against the Minivan

  • QOES: How Many Times Per Week Do You Actually Exercise?

    7 Jul 2015 | 6:00 am
    We're supposed to exercise. I know this. You know this. We all know this. Clearly knowing and doing can be mutually exclusive. We find all sorts of creative ways to feel better about our couch sitting. Making fun of CrossFit commies is super fun while being simultaneously jealous of their abs.Sometimes our expectations can be a little...unreasonable. SourceNot everyone on Facebook can be exercising as much as it appears they are, right? Please say I'm right.Then there's all those distractions.SourceThis is a tough question for me because I go in fits and starts. I'm either exercising every…
  • Two days in Paris with kids

    6 Jul 2015 | 6:12 am
    On our way to Tanzania for a week-long safari, we decided to open up our layover in Amsterdam and spend two days in Amsterdam and two days in Paris. Thanks to the high-speed Thalys train, we were able to get from Amsterdam to Paris in about 3 hours. We arrived to Paris around midnight, when the kids’ exhaustion and jet lag morphed into giddiness. Nothing like a 1am dance party in Paris. We found a hotel that had three beds per room just outside of Paris’s main train station. This was great because it was much cheaper than being in the middle of the city, but connected us via metro line.
  • What I want you to know about self-harm

    6 Jul 2015 | 6:00 am
    What I Want You to Know is a series of reader submissions. It is an attempt to allow people to tell their personal stories, in the hopes of bringing greater compassion to the unique issues each of us face. If you would like to submit a story to this series, click here. Today’s guest post is by Lacey. I first began self-harming, through cutting myselfwhen I was 18. I was already dealing with depression, anxiety, and bulimia, when self-harm came onto the scene, as well as working through the aftermath of childhood sexual abuse. If I truly look back though, the tendency to…
  • Two days in Amsterdam with kids

    5 Jul 2015 | 2:13 am
    When booking our tickets to Tanzania, we realized that we had a short layover in Amsterdam in between two ten-hour flights. Its a long haul and we decided to inquire about opening up the layover for a few days. It would allow us time to catch up on sleep after an overnight flight, break up the long flights, and also spend a few days in a new country. It didn’t cost anything extra to do this, and I’m so glad we did. Here is how we spent two days in Amsterdam with our kids.*     This is how we looked before our overnight flight:   And this is how we looked after (overtired,…
  • Friday Finds: Hot Pots & Planters

    3 Jul 2015 | 6:00 pm
    1. Chunky White Block Planter | CB22. Threshold Ceramic 2-Hole Hanging Planter | Target 3. Large Mod Cube Planter by Torre | Gilt 4. Mod Metal Planter | Urban Outfitters 5.Teak Wood Hanging Planter | Anthropologie 6. Iris Planter + Chevron Stand | West Elm 7. Micro Dot Cache Pot | West Elm 8. Mod Saucer Planter in Orange | Dot & Bo9. Owl Planter by LunaReece | Etsy
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    Lost Daughters

  • Family Ties

    Elle
    6 Jul 2015 | 9:00 pm
    From time to time I find myself wanting to get closer to my birth siblings than what I am. Than I need to remind myself of the events that happened and the family dynamic which I am starting to accept. I can now , finally accept that my reunion did not turn out as well as I had hoped. More importantly I no longer blame myself for the disapointment...My birth family are above the average size, there's a father and a mother and a daughter and a son. So far so good, but there's also five additional daughters as well as one daughter that my mother carried and gave birth to -(that would be me).
  • The Twinkie Emerges from Isolation

    mothermade
    25 Jun 2015 | 9:00 pm
    This girl. She sat in the classroom, mostly alone between two seas … one black and one white. Listening … always listening.Giggles would explode from one group or another. I would often laugh with the white girls, in hopes of “fitting in.” But when the tables turned and either group would make an Asian slight, I was utterly alone … and left laughing nervously with everyone, hoping it would end.Recently, at the American Adoption Conference (AAC), I had a similar experience that Lost Daughter sister, Amira Rose documented. It went like this …“Whoa, there was a…
  • Thoughts on Family after a Decade in Reunion

    Karen Pickell
    25 Jun 2015 | 4:30 am
    The definition of the verb reunite is straightforward: to be together again after being apart for a long time. But we perceive a connotation of family when we use the word reunion, don’t we?Family is not one universal thing. It is thousands of permutations of people interacting with each other as some kind of cohesive unit. The glue may be love or duty or tradition. Blood plays into it but is not the whole of it, except in the sense of ancestry. Our spouses are family in a non-ancestral sense, by means other than blood. Our lost blood relations may never become family in the way we desire.
  • Adoptees and The Importance of Being Physically Active

    Annette-Kassaye
    21 Jun 2015 | 5:39 pm
    Doing my daily dose of handstandsThese past few months, I’ve been spending less time keeping up to date with everything that happens in the adoption world. I've needed more time, space and silence to focus on myself. Not only to find strength to continue, but also to restore the balance between my mind and my body. I was living too much in my head and not enough in my body. This is partly a societal problem; most of us live very sedentary lifestyles; we spend so much time sitting down at work, reading off of screens and interacting through screens. We don't inhabit our bodies enough. I…
  • Exposing the Roots: Family, History, Community and the #CharlestonSyllabus

    Amira Rose Davis
    20 Jun 2015 | 5:47 pm
    “We who believe in freedom cannot rest until it comes”The melodies of Sweet Honey and the Rock filled my office on early Thursday morning, as I wrestled with the terrible news pouring out of Charleston. Like many Black Americans, I have been overwhelmed by the spectacle of black deaths and the violence wrought on black bodies. I am worn out by contrived narratives and false allies. I am sick of hearing the deafening silence of my non-black friends and family members. I am sick of watching people dance around the naming of white supremacy. I often feel like I am existing somewhere between…
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    Transracialeyes

  • Identifying Wrong

    girl4708
    12 Jun 2015 | 11:54 pm
    All the buzz in social media right now is about an NAACP official who turns out to not be black as claimed.  She was born to a white couple and raised with black adoptees.  There have been other articles wondering whether or not being transracial is analogous to being transgendered.  And other articles about syndromes of delusion. Rachel […]
  • knowing you’re forgetting: the orphan’s heartache

    girl4708
    27 Mar 2015 | 9:04 pm
    Most intercountry adoptees reading on the internet are gen x’ers or millennials.  Very few are baby boomers, because we were the first to have been subjected to this social experiment en masse, and we are aging. And, if the rest of older adoptees are like me, we are exceptionally (acquaintances might even say irrationally) afraid of […]
  • What is the obverse of “ghost” and “haunting”?

    Daniel Ibn Zayd
    7 Mar 2015 | 8:40 am
    We’ve spoken about ghosts here and there. Lately, with reunion looming, I feel like I am haunting my own life, finding might-have-been footsteps; meeting could-have-been friends and, inch’allah, even family. But the metaphor is bothering me. A ghost is the immaterial which haunts the physical plane of the past, of what was. What is it […]
  • What does it mean to be adopted to a post racial world?

    girl4708
    6 Dec 2014 | 12:22 pm
    Like many people here in America, currently in racial turmoil over grand jury decisions not to indict police officers who have killed unarmed black men, I shared this image on facebook.  A few days later, articles appeared berating the photo’s manipulation and message.  Clearly, other people think harder than I do before sharing. The first […]
  • “Coming Out” As Adopted

    Snow Leopard
    27 Sep 2014 | 6:39 pm
    The metaphor of “coming out” has been used elsewhere as a way to describe the experience of disclosing one’s status as adopted. What do you think about how this metaphor illuminates and distorts being open about one’s adoption experience?
 
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    Together for Adoption

  • Stop giving your life to Jesus. Stop it!

    Dan Cruver
    23 Jun 2015 | 10:31 am
    It’s not unusual for me to meet orphan care advocates, foster care and adoptive parents, and orphan prevention activists who feel burned out. The energy and enthusiasm that once characterized their efforts to advocate for orphaned and vulnerable children has all but evaporated. They are weary and heavy-laden (Matthew 11:28).“It’s not unusual for me to meet orphan care advocates who feel burned out. If that’s you…”Click To TweetBeing an orphan-caring, orphan-loving, orphan-serving advocate is eternally significant work. James tells us that the actual…
  • Good News for Emanuel African Methodist Episcopal Church and All Who Suffer

    Dan Cruver
    21 Jun 2015 | 1:53 pm
    “When the eternal Son of God became man, he ushered his infinite, flawless communion with the Father into the depths of our sin, pain, and suffering (see Mark 14:36), not impersonally but in a profoundly personal manner. Jesus’ communion with the Father and the Spirit did not detach or distance him from the brokenness of our world. To the contrary, it thrust him into the darkest depths of our fallen world in order that he might heal and deliver us through his death, burial, and resurrection.“At what point did the Father declare, ‘This is my beloved Son, with whom I am well…
  • Anderson Cooper Interviews T4A Speaker Angela Tucker about the Term Transracial

    Dan Cruver
    18 Jun 2015 | 12:19 pm
    Anderson Cooper of CNN interviews Angela Tucker (a speaker at T4A this year) about the current use of the word transracial in the media over the last few weeks. Listen to her spot-on take on it. Join Angela Tucker at our November 5-7 conference in Durham, NC.
  • Adoption Nuggets (28): Dipping Into Metaphorical Theology (10)

    Tim J R Trumper
    5 Jun 2015 | 12:50 pm
     Question #4: What impact does the belief that God’s adoption of his people is metaphorical have on the way we understand Paul’s language? Our endeavor to clear the ground for a fresh perspective on the biblical teaching of adoption has led us to engage a series of questions. In answering the first three, we have disentangled the filial or familial language of the New Testament relevant to the new birth from that of adoption. Adoption, it is now clear, is the explicit teaching of the apostle Paul alone. His unique use of huiothesia ~ the sole New Testament term for adoption …
  • Pushing for Change in Your Non-Profit? Here’s the Roadmap.

    Dan Cruver
    21 May 2015 | 11:51 am
    About Switch:#1 New York Times and Wall Street Journal bestsellerTranslated into 24 languagesLed by Susan Heath Hays. Susan has 20+ years experience working with non-profit organizations. Currently, she consults with Head Start programs across the country with a focus on improving leadership and engaging families. Susan is a Switch Certified Trainer specializing in change efforts within school systems and non-profits.“Any leader looking to create change in his organization need not look beyond this little book. It is packed with examples and hands-on tools that will get you moving…
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    AMERICAN INDIAN ADOPTEES

  • Third lawsuit challenging ICWA

    6 Jul 2015 | 9:14 am
    baby selling was rampant Posted on July 6, 2015 by TURTLE TALK | Kate Fort From the press release we received. This will become the third ongoing federal lawsuit challenging ICWA:Goldwater Institute to File Class Action Lawsuit Against Indian Child Welfare ActInstitute launching Equal Protection for Indian Children Project to reform federal and state laws that discriminate against abused and neglected Native American childrenContact: Starlee Coleman, (602) 758-9162Phoenix—Tomorrow, Tuesday, July 7, the Goldwater Institute will launch a new project to reform the Indian Child Welfare Act and…
  • UNJUST Sealed Birth Certificate Laws

    1 Jul 2015 | 4:39 am
    My original birth certificate--everyone should have the sameAs the legislative session wound down in New York, the Assembly passed a bill that allows natural birth parents not only a veto, but put in place a confidential intermediary system, those assuring that many more birth mothers will deny their children knowledge of their original identity. The bill (S5964) was referred to the Senate Rules committee but in the flurry of activity that engulfs the legislative chambers in the last hours of every session, it stayed in committee as the session ended.After years of work on giving adoptees the…
  • If Truth Be Told

    25 Jun 2015 | 6:16 am
    By Lorie Graham and Kathryn E. Fort | THE HILL, Congress BlogFor more than a century, the governments of Canada and the United States pursued a policy of forcible removal of indigenous children from their homes and communities.  The Truth and Reconciliation Commission of Canada recently released a report on these removal practices, recognizing them to be part of a policy of “cultural genocide.”On June 14 the Maine Wabanaki-State Child Welfare Truth and Reconciliation Commission released its own official findings on the widespread removal of Wabanaki children in that…
  • Aboriginal history, culture coming to B.C. schools curriculum

    20 Jun 2015 | 6:05 am
    Posted by Zig Zag Marines from the Royal Navy destroying a Kwakwaka’wakw village in 1850, from The 500 Years of Resistance Comic Book, by Gord Hill. ‘You can’t have reconciliation unless you understand what the truth behind it is,’ said Peter Fassbender By All Points West, CBC News, June 19, 2015It’s meant to be a step towards reconciliation: B.C.’s new education curriculum will include more instruction on aboriginal culture and history.The province says this is a response to a “call for action” coming out of the Truth and Reconciliation…
  • 60s Scoop: ‘They just wanted to remove an Indian child into a white home’

    18 Jun 2015 | 2:55 am
      Jun 17 Posted by Zig ZagArt by Tania Willard, Secwepemc.By Chinta Puxley, The Canadian Press/CBC News, June 17, 2015Child welfare agents took Christine Merasty from her mother’s arms shortly after her birth at a hospital on Christmas Day in 1970. It was supposed to be a six-month arrangement to allow her mother — a residential school survivor — to get her life together after living on the streets of downtown Winnipeg. But child-welfare workers were already showing the infant’s picture to prospective white families for adoption. Christine was taken to her new home in the…
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    Infant Adoption Guide

  • IAG 036: Adoptive Dad panel Part 2 – a guy’s view on infant adoption

    Tim Elder
    29 Jun 2015 | 9:54 pm
    This is is part 2 of the amazing adoptive dad panel where Jake Stewart, Dan Welz and I have a rare talk about infant adoption from a guy’s point of view. If you haven’t listened to part 1 yet, I highly recommend you check it out first. Jake told his adoption story in Episode 23. He […]
  • IAG 035: Adoptive dad panel – infant adoption from a guy’s point of view – Part 1

    Tim Elder
    19 Jun 2015 | 10:21 pm
    This episode is one that I’ve wanted to do for a long time. It is very special to me because we have not one but two dads as guests on the show – Jake Stewart and Dan Welz. These guys are here to have a very rare and unique roundtable discussion – a guy’s view […]
  • The Dreams that You Dare to Dream Really Do Come True…. Don’t They? Part 2

    Tim Elder
    4 Jun 2015 | 10:04 am
    The following is a guest post by hopeful adoptive mom, Josie Sowers. She and her husband Scott are currently waiting to adopt. She shares her heart and her faith as they get closer to the day when their dream of becoming parents comes true. You can read part 1. The following is part 2 by […]
  • IAG 034: Coley Strickland of Birthmom Buds

    Tim Elder
    25 May 2015 | 7:51 am
    We have a very special guest on the show – Nicole “Coley” Strickland is here to share about her experience as a birthmom, and how she went on to co-found BirthmomBuds.com. Coley is the President and Executive Director of BirthMom Buds which provides support to birthmothers through its many programs including the buddy system, pregnant […]
  • The Dreams that You Dare to Dream Really Do Come True…. Don’t They? Part 1

    Tim Elder
    22 May 2015 | 6:37 am
    The following is a guest post by hopeful adoptive mom, Josie Sowers. She and her husband Scott are currently waiting to adopt. She shares her heart and her faith as they get closer to the day when their dream of becoming parents comes true. This is part 1 of 2 posts by Josie. Here you go… […]
 
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    All In The Family of Adoption

  • She Changed My Life

    Robin
    5 Jul 2015 | 5:31 am
    Lorraine Dusky, that is. It was the early 1990s. As a result of some changes in my personal life, I became interested in learning more about adoption and about my hidden past. So I decided to go to the library and do some research, when I came across an amazing book called Birthmark written by a […]
  • Whose Child is She, Anyway?

    Robin
    13 Jun 2015 | 2:11 pm
    One of the reasons Veronica and Dusten Brown’s story has affected me so profoundly is because it epitomizes the change in mindset that adoption has undergone in the last 60 plus years. It strikes at the core set of beliefs about adoption that have been evolving since at least World War II. Before WWII, children born […]
  • Unwanted

    Robin
    28 May 2015 | 5:06 am
    Unwanted. Isn’t that really the key? Isn’t that what makes being adopted hurt so darn much? To think that you were unwanted by your own parents, by the very people who created you and brought you into this world. In my opinion, there can be no more profound rejection than being rejected by one’s own […]
  • Dusten Brown in the news

    Robin
    21 May 2015 | 12:48 pm
    Once again, I have been brought to tears by the adoption story that has affected me like no other. Dusten Brown is in the news again giving his support to proposed changes in the ICWA so that the tragedy that happened to him will not happen to another family. We also want to congratulate Dusten […]
  • A Wolf in Sheep’s Clothing

    Robin
    7 May 2015 | 3:20 pm
    Adoption has been called many things. It’s been called a win-win-win, the answer to an expectant mother’s prayers when she’s facing a crisis pregnancy, a way to save all the orphans of the world, and a wonderful way to create a family (on a par with a biological family). It’s also been called the answer […]
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    America Adopts

  • Why I’m Making A Film About An Adoption That Happened Nearly 100 Years Ago

    Lawrence
    7 Jul 2015 | 7:48 am
    This guest post is by Jennifer Kachler, a filmmaker. Since I was a child, I grew up being conscious that my Nana (my Mother’s Mother) was adopted. It was a story she would share with us like the many other stories she would tell us about her childhood. She was born in 1924 in Maine and adopted when she was 9 months old. She never knew her birth parents or if she had any siblings. As I got older and understood more about adoption and family ancestry, I questioned her why she never searched for her birth family. Being the oldest of four daughters, I have a strong bond with my sisters and our…
  • What’s The Difference Between Open and Closed Adoption?

    Lawrence
    30 Jun 2015 | 7:00 am
    This guest post is by Karie Boyd, an adoption attorney. What’s the difference between open and closed adoption? If you’re hoping to adopt or thinking about placing your baby for adoption, you may be asking yourself that question and wondering which route is right for you and your child. There are many misconceptions about adoption, and about open and closed adoption in particular. Adopting a baby or placing a baby for adoption is a complicated and deeply personal decision. Each one has its advantages and disadvantages. At the end of the day, it comes down to a number of…
  • To The Expectant Mother Who Chose Me To Adopt Her Baby, After Her Miscarriage

    Lawrence
    26 Jun 2015 | 6:00 am
    This guest post is by Nicole, a hopeful adoptive parent. Dearest K, We’ve spent the last six weeks getting to know each other. Even though you were early in your pregnancy I never doubted your commitment for this open adoption. I loved our conversations and the pictures we exchanged in anticipation for what was next. The long and short conversations we’d have every day, I’ll miss those. I could feel the excitement even through email as our trip to meet and match was getting closer. You are bright, beautiful, and one of the sweetest people I’ve had the privilege to…
  • 3 Things I Learned After Being With My Daughter’s Birthmother On Delivery Day

    Lawrence
    22 Jun 2015 | 9:07 pm
    This guest post is by Leah Campbell, an adoptive mother and writer. On the day my daughter was born I sat in the hospital lobby, waiting for news that she had entered the world. During her pregnancy her birthmother and I had talked about how this day would go and I respected the fact that she did not want me, or anyone else, in the room with her during labor. I had always believed that decision was solely hers to make, and I never questioned her when she outlined for me how she wanted to handle the day. After our daughter was born, she said she wanted a few moments to look at her, but did not…
  • An Adoptive Father’s Letter To His Son’s Birthfather

    Lawrence
    21 Jun 2015 | 6:14 am
    This guest post is by Noah, an adoptive father. How do we thank you? You helped bring into this world this precious boy. You decided to be a part of his life when so many others would have disappeared. You were not tied to his birthmother. The two of you had long before gone your separate ways. You lived in three states away and yet you were there at the beginning and you continue to be there today. When we first met you, I saw a young creative idealist. A young man full of life, passion, and intellectual curiosity. I saw a little bit of myself when I was younger and I enjoyed seeing…
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    Canada Adopts

  • 18 Motivating Quotes To Inspire You While You Wait To Adopt

    Lawrence
    2 Jul 2015 | 7:30 am
    Summertime, and the livin’ is easy. That is, unless you’re waiting to adopt, in which case things couldn’t be harder. While other couples are outside with their baby strollers or playing with their children in the park, you’re cooped up inside waiting for the phone to ring and wondering if your turn will ever come. But in the same way that winter turns to spring and spring gives way to summer, you need to believe that things will not only change, but change for the better. And so, in keeping with the summery vibe, here are 18 motivational quotes to boost your…
  • The 3 Simple Words I Tell Waiting Adoptive Parents Who Feel Like Quitting

    Lawrence
    25 Jun 2015 | 5:24 am
    This guest post is by Tami, an adoptive mother.  A few years ago I was just like you. I was waiting to adopt. More than anything else in the world I wanted to become a mother. But every day a new problem would come up, and I started to doubt it would ever happen. Eventually it got so bad that I was ready to quit. And while I don’t know your particular circumstances or the challenges you’re facing, I’m happy to say that I made it through. And I know you can too. Adoption WILL work if you DON’T give up. Those three simple words—Don’t Give Up—have been my…
  • A Pregnant Woman Has Just Picked You To Adopt Her Baby: 3 Things You Need To Know

    Lawrence
    18 Jun 2015 | 4:17 pm
    It’s the moment that every prospective adoptive parent lives for: Getting the call that a pregnant woman has chosen you to adopt her baby. But what happens next? What should you do? How should you feel? For most hopeful parents, it’s a tricky situation. Naturally, you’re excited. Who wouldn’t be? But at the same time, you know there’s a very real possibility that the woman could change her mind and the whole thing could suddenly fall through. Or that it could be a scam. No wonder people describe it as “an emotional roller coaster.” I was thinking about this…
  • How Adoption Taught Me The True Meaning Of Sisterhood

    Lawrence
    11 Jun 2015 | 6:48 am
    This guest post is by Carole Sanguedolce, an author. One day, when I was 31 years old, I got a phone call from my mother. It must have been the most difficult call of her life. She was calling to tell me that I had a sister I never knew existed. Her voice was shaky and she was very emotional. She kept saying “You are going to think I am a terrible person. Everyone will think I am a terrible person.” I had to keep assuring her that nothing she could tell me would make me think that. Then she finally told me the news, my heart broke for her. For what must have seemed like an…
  • Changing Your Mind About Adoption: How To Tell The Prospective Parents

    Lawrence
    4 Jun 2015 | 11:51 am
    No one likes bad news, and no one likes to be the one to deliver it. But sometimes you just don’t have a choice. Sometimes you decide it’s time to change course and go down a different path. If you’re pregnant and were considering adoption but are now having second thoughts about your plan, you may find yourself in this position. Until recently you might have fully intended to go through with your plan. But then something happened, things changed, and now you’re not sure you want to go ahead with it any more. Maybe you thought that you weren’t ready to care for a child…
 
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    Great Wall, Pandas, and Mcdonald's

  • Mid day report

    Sean Fahey
    7 Jul 2015 | 10:10 am
    The day is going like usual.  I have been entering information and trying to get some work done.  Angie is getting the house ready for the visit.  I hope they will be able to attend Ant Man tonight.  I want to see this also, but I want her to get away and have some fun.  I will stay with the younger children.  I can catch the movie later on.  That way we will all have a chance to see it.  I bet even Kayla gets to see that one.  I think she is looking forward to Minions.  I am wondering if that movie will be too much Minions.  They are…
  • One Month Meeting

    Sean Fahey
    7 Jul 2015 | 4:17 am
    Today, we have a meeting with our social worker.  She is doing a check on Elana to make sure she is adjusting to our family.  I'd say she is.  She is getting used to sleeping by herself.  If we could just get her in her crib.  This report used to be mandatory by China, but they cut out some of the reports.  Our agency still requires it. It benefits everyone.  If we were a struggling family, the agency would find out and be able to assist.  They could call on other families that have had the same issues.  In our case, there will be nothing.  We…
  • In the mouth of babes

    Sean Fahey
    6 Jul 2015 | 9:51 am
    Elana does not really say anything.  We here ma and maybe ba.  The rest is frustration and crying.  Lately, Mia has taught her one of her songs.  She sings bumble bee to the music of Jingle Bells.  Elana has started singing this.  We told Mia that Elana has picked up one of her songs.  We are hoping she will be proud and start warming up to her.  Yesterday, Elana had a scream in the car.  Mia told her that we were almost home.
  • You Can't Play in my Sandbox!

    Sean Fahey
    6 Jul 2015 | 9:45 am
    You've got to love work.  When people don't get along or do things a certain way, how should it be resolved?  In places I have worked, it usually ended in a blow up.  I remember a low point in my career when I yelled at a coworker.  We tried to go through the supervisor, but the person did not stop talking about us.  One day, I had had enough.  I did not get in as much trouble as I could have, but I did learn to not let things bother me as much. In other places, you could get praise all day long until something goes wrong.  Then you get the third degree as…
  • Sibling Rivalry

    Sean Fahey
    5 Jul 2015 | 2:38 pm
    We have been through this many times.  I know Kayla and Michelle went through it. Michelle and Kiersten went through or are still going through it.Now we have Mia and Elana.  They keep fighting for Angie's attention.  Mia has even resorted to pinching Angie.  She also depends a lot of time in the back rooms.  When Elana and Mia are near each other, we get kicking and pushing.  As they get more comfortable, I hope they will be friends.  Until that time comes. . .
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